So far today has been emotionally overwhelming.
I phoned the vet first thing in the morning to ask about Sadie’s response to the phenobarbitol. Sadie’s regular vet is out of town until Monday, so one of his colleagues returned the call. She was very kind, but she said that Sadie has brain cancer and is going to die. She told me it could happen in the next few days or weeks. She wanted us to bring Sadie in to the clinic.
Mr. Wren said he did not want to take Sadie to the clinic, because he didn’t think they could do anything for her. He wanted to keep her at home and make her comfortable. I phoned the vet back to let her know we wouldn’t be coming in. She was very kind and gave me her cell phone so that I could phone her if we needed her to come to our house and put Sadie to sleep over the weekend.
I was so upset, I ended up coming home. Mr. Wren thinks that we should not get too worked up over the opinion of a vet who has never met Sadie. That is probably right. He also disagreed with the vet, who told me to completely discontinue the phenobarb, so instead we gave Sadie a smaller dose – 1/4 pill, rather than a whole one.
Sadie has slowly been getting better throughout the day. She has been drinking water and eating food, although her appetite has been a bit delicate, and she is alert and bright-eyed. She is feeling quite weak, and it is really hard for her to get on her feet. At one point, I was convinced that her hind quarters were paralyzed. Then I saw that she was trying to get up, so I carried her out to the yard. A little while later, she was up on her own to poop. So she obviously is not paralyzed.
I think Mr. Wren is right with his idea to make her comfortable and not to panic. My brain keeps jumping to conclusions, and then I get very upset. In the worst case scenario, we will have to end up calling the fill-in vet and that will be that. But Mr. Wren says he doesn’t think it is time to give up on Sadie.
This is really hard. I sure do wish I could find a way to come to terms with this better.

