Well… 2 things have happened to sort of make the transition easier for me.
1) I went for a few job interviews, and while none of them materialized, thanks to my sucky status as someone who requires sponsorship, I discovered a newer side of me – one that was not scared of talking to strangers.
2) I wrote a couple of articles for magazines, and had to interview people for them. Suddenly I had to open up and strike conversations, but now I didn’t need to take it personally. It was all for the sake of those “pieces”.
I used to duck into doors when I saw someone I knew approaching. I’m the person that used to run to the bathroom everytime the phone rang and it was an acquaintance (anyone other than my sis/bro/mom I would avoid talking to) – that’s how shy/reluctant I was about talking. I still get those panic attack type moments when I wanna run away and not talk, but its not as scary as before.
If anyone’s interested in starting one, email me at pram310 at gmail dot com. I don’t have a great deal of experience moderating a group, or even writing, but this is my year of magical thinking – and I’m willing to give it a fair shot.
It’s empowering. My DH belongs to the school that thinks since we’re living in the same house, carpooling to work, we should share a joint account, which we do. He was vehemently against my starting an account. He’s been handling most of the finances, and he’s a spender as opposed to me – I’m more prudent with money, so I was going crazy.
But I’ve realized it’s good to have a separation at some point, so if you need to save/spend more than the other person you have a little stash just to do that. It took a lot of convincing, but I finally did it this weekend. Women, especially, pls do it, don’t get scared thinking its money and math and finances, how’m I gonna deal with it.