Ilaria

People suck.

This morning I am in full “IHATETHEWORLD” mode so don’t mind a slighty pessimistic tone to everthing and anything I write, but I realized growing up that people ill ALWAYS have something to comment / criticize / gossip about. No matter what.

You’re fat? Don’t worry, if you lose weight they’ll comment about what a psycho anorexic you are.

You’re shy? You’re weird and antisocial.
You try to be more outgoing? You’re an exhibitionist.
No boyfriend? You dyke.
Boyfriend? Tramp.

I love human beings. Nice big pack of wandering shits, most of the time. THe people who actuall accept you and like you the way you are, realizing that you do have faults but loving you nonetheless, are few and far between.

And I’ve decided that I reall have to stop listening to people who think the can dictate to me how to live my life and how to be perfect for them… because as soon as you change for ONE person, the next will have something just fucking mean to say anyways.

Resolution : stop giving a fuck.

Starting to actuall doubt that this for me will ever happen and before ou throw yourselves into frenzies telling me not to self-pity myself and yada yada yada I assure you I am not.

I am however extremely cynical and a little demoralized considering that at the ripe old age of 23 all of my little girlfriends are now or have sooner or later been in serious relationships (and at 23 I assure you that serious 7 yr relationships are not an easy task) and me… nothing.

Yeah, a year here, a few months there. But not once have I fucking met someone that tells me, “Ilaria, you’re perfect for me.”

Am I such a rotten person? No, I don’t think so, really.

I try. At times. When I find someone that i my opinion is a valid enough human being. Are they really? I wouldn’t know. In a matter of months I find out that they really suck at life (they all have a million skeletons – or girlfriends – in their many various closets) and they just never seem to think it of enough importance to actually TELL me about it.

Oh yeah. It’s so…secondary.
Yeah, right.

I just wish someone would realized that I have feelings and that, somewhere deep down, I kind of matter too.

..unless your daily habits are such that all you do in life is sit down on your couch and watch jerry springer while eating 3 bags of doritos I think it’s pretty safe to say that be healthy excercising 3-4 times a week is PLENTY.. Usually in a workday one tends to stay relatively active – a little aerobics a few times a week is good enough – don’t stress if you can’t pump 45 min of cardio EVERY DAY.. that’s just going to wear down on your articulations and before you know it you’ll be knocking on your local orthopedics door because your knees hurt.

Moderation people.