was at a BBQ Sunday and was offered a beer…I brought my Iced Tea, to help me get by. Luckly, no heavy drinkers at the BBQ. Well, their were 2 of us, and we both weren’t drinking? Hey, nice to have company on the “No Thank you to beer”
I was ‘questioned’ why I did not want a ‘beer’
I was ‘told’ how I wasn’t a ‘big’ drinker
I was also reminded that ’ you can have just 1 ‘
It just shows how interested people are in you. I’ve know these folks for 6 years now. I guess they missed me at the parties we went to, or at the pool over the summer while I was getting blasted !
I’m happy to know that i can choose to drink or not, most people don’t follow your life. The only ones who really care if your drinking or not are the ones looking for a drinking buddy!
Here’s an image for you ladies,
2 weeks ago
Went to bed last night looking forward to a good nights rest, to no avail. Woke at 3am only to toss and turn, have bad dreams and a racing mindful of thoughts.
At 6am time to rise. I have a feeling of a hang-over without the ‘pleasure’ of AL in my system. Yes, I feel like shit!
Now, my anxiety is running thoughts about getting rest tonight at 9 am in the morning. Will I be able to sleep? Hmmm…maybe a drink or 2 (3,4,5,6,7,) to relax. Blah..Blah…blah.
I have other things to deal with right now in my life.. and AL is on the lowest part of that list… and will not be a influenced in my life!
2 weeks ago
When I last attempted to remain AL free I used the 99 days of summer. Feeling that a bench mark would help with having an end in sight.
Which it did, by giving me the comfort to know I will not die without AL and that I can still handle life’s situations.
It will be 6 months free of AL on the 6th of May. Not comforting that Cinco de Mayo “deals” are pouring over the radio driving the desire to celebrate. I just keep reminding myself about the losses I suffered, even though they are small ones, and that these can become big!
As I approach my 6 month I will need to keep focus on my decision not to drink and let AL suffer the pain (to do without).
2 weeks ago
Getting ready for a busy ‘yard work’ weekend. For some reason AL wants to join me to. I was seeing a cold 6 pack nearby as I dig in the dirt on a beautiful sunny Friday afternoon. Lucky, I’m at work with just a daydream.
I decided to stop by the store and pick up a couple of jugs of iced tea I enjoy from time to time and plan on have a drinking party with it!
Well, in all in the preparation !
3 weeks ago
that most of society is at step 5. Luckly, that’s where I stopped because I can see step 6 coming my way soon.
Stay Strong ! 3 weeks ago
I had the same type dreams when I gave up smoking ( Nicotine ) 20 years ago.
It’s like rynlikesit said ” it a free pass ”
( or quoted from someone on 43 Things )
I even hate drinking in the dreams, I feel like I let myself down.
But, when I wake to realize it was a dream…
what relieve :) 4 weeks ago
drinking dream Thursday night. Wife went out of town for several weeks. This is usually my ‘party’ time at home to just drink, drink, drink without any worries of the complaints from a spouse.
Not that she ever did complain about my drinking, but as we know, we drink on the down-low.
Well, I woke up Friday having the hangover feeling, more from improper sleep, but at least it was no from AL. 4 weeks ago
Spent a week away with the family and my parents. As usual totally stressful. We had a type of family reunion, but with best friends and the parents. I know they like to have a few beers ,which they do, I don’t…
So, I picked up several gallons of Iced tea to bring along. This would be my over indulgence while everyone else had a few beers. That time came and I politely declined, and I shared my $1000.00 violin story. ( read early posts )
We all laughed at my stupidity and moved along with enjoying our time and company together.
As the week went on I had several opportunities to pick-up a beer at local gas stations / tiki bar / restaurants and thought how nice it would be to have one poolside overlooking the Gulf of Mexico.
My wife and I had a chance to take a several hour walk along the beach and she wanted to stop for a quick late nite bite. She even asked me if I’d like a beer or cocktail ? Hmmmmm? I just said I’m fine…
I just didn’t do it !! all week and reminded myself there are others out there who also don’t do it…. I want to be one of them :)
almost 6 months ( I think )
1 month ago
How was the party? How are you feeling about your AL today? 1 month ago
You think you would have learned the lessen on Fermentation long ago :) 1 month ago
I too feel the same way from time to time. I just keep telling myself ” it’s OK to feel this way” drinking may make it better,but that’s not what I want to do.
Today, a fella and I was speaking about our upcoming “spring” breaks. He was saying how he was going to spend his time Drinking, Playing golf, and doing other “family” things while they were away.
I said, well I done with the drinking so, I guess I’ll be just having coffee….
He said, “I don’t have respect for people who don’t drink” . I replied that’s ok, I’m not going with you :)
I thought what a dumb statement to make and moved on…....
Hmmm..seem I moved onto myself again..
Well, Thanks again…. your guidance is needed and gratefully appreciated 1 month ago
1)You can’t count your hair.
2)You can’t wash your eyes with soap.
3)You can’t breathe when your tongue is out.
Put your tongue back in your mouth, you silly person.
Ten (10) Things I know about you.
1) You are reading this.
2) You are human.
3) You can’t say the letter ’’P’’ without separating your lips.
4) You just attempted to do it.
6) You are laughing at yourself.
7) You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5.
8) You just checked to see if there is a No. 5.
9) You laugh at this because you are a fun loving person & everyone does
10) You are probably going to send this to see who else falls for it.
You have received this e-mail because I didn’t want to be laugh alone . Have a great Day. Laugh, and then Laugh and sing
It’s a Beautiful Day even when it’s not.
“Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.”
1 month ago
and I’d like to know, when do I start feeling normal? or knowing what is normal?
I have been dealing with feelings of depression and questioning my existence? Or, is it the boredom of life, which AL had once made “fun”.
As I type and ponder, I believe it all lies in the fact that I have an additive personality. I need to find another additive outlet which is healthy, allowing me to get the euphoric feeling.
1 month ago
Sorry, sister…the Honeymoon will always end.
Your Honeymoon was with AL, now your in the divorce stage.
We ( including me ) must remember that with each failure we took on step ahead. That includes the day by day humdrum of heading to and from, without AL.
I think your doing well, just being hard on yourself. Which we all do…when we stumble.
Look at posting here on 43 things as brushing yourself off and getting back on your feet again.
If you keep working at it, it will stick…
Do you ride a bike? Skate? I bet, you crashed several times…and then were told ” get on up and have another go at it”
Your loved one, then held the seat or your hand and helped you along….
I know that it’s happening here, I may not know you but, I sure do love you! because your just like me…...
1 month ago
will be required to work the steps. You can not do them alone. Hence, why it take some years to start working them.
I worked the steps in another 12 step program, and it is scary to open oneself to reality. But, it really does help, YOU!
remember, a sponsor is there to carry you when your in need,
You may only see one set of footprints, that’s because your being lifted up…
I like using 43 things because of the small community and the anonymity we can keep between each other. While still helping and becoming free of our failures, with triumph being our final goal. 1 month ago
it took me time and practice to drink…why shouldn’t it take time to stop…
You had 100 days, now you’ll have 100 more…
Just think about what you learned in the first 100 days… that is what will carry you the next 100 and so on , and so on ….
Keep on working at it! 2 months ago
well at least it was only a dream.
The other night while sound-a-sleep I had this horrifying dream I was out at some social event, Art opening. As usual they were serving wine and at first, I was passing on the temptation. After a few minutes of watching others enjoy themselves as they drank from their plastic cup of wine, I gave in.
All the while, I was mulling around in my head “this is not what I want to do”. Feeling guilty, I decided if I was going to drink, I am going full blast!
I actually felt drunk in my sleep…which had woke me from this dream.
After realizing it was only a dream I started to think.
Is there really going to be a happy time in my life without AL?
How do other people “have fun” without AL?
Well at least, I’m no longer an asshole to my family :)
Which, I don’t think I ever was, but the past speaks for itself
It’s funny to think at this time in the south we are just now having AL sale in the county, and on Sundays.
2 months ago
use it and become free, and all the while tell us about it :) 2 months ago
the wife, just like your hubby AL is no biggie to my wife. She actually complains sometimes when she needs to drink for social reasons?
My wife knows, ever since I lost $1000.00 dollars to a bid, while drunk. ( its in an early blog ) We have been out several time and I was offered, I just replied “No” even when my wife asked me if I’d like something….
I would rather stay home with my kids then be in a social environment…
2 months ago
So, I did not have anything to drink on my b-day… It turns out it was just another day… My wife even forgot about it.
I guess it just comes along with the changes without AL and getting older. Several days ago my wife said something to the fact that I have been really pleasant and not so uptight. I can only contribute it to not drinking.
Personally, I’ve been feeling more depressed every now and then. I guess it’s depression, it maybe the fact that I have no ambitions, hobbies or desires to do anything. I look forward to bed and coffee in the morning.
2 months ago
I will be doing the same myself on Friday !!
This is the biggest Birthday Cake I could find for you… It’s so big I needed to keep 1/2 for myself :- )
Hope it was fun !!
2 months ago
No AL in this cooking pot :) 2 months ago
On the stop drinking blog.
I was on the blog several years ago. Thinking I needed to stop binging. Turns out I needed to stop drinking altogether.
You doing the right thing…we can use your encouragement and guidance … 3 months ago
you have. She noticed your behavioral changes from one state to another.
I know my kids did also, they never brought it up. At least if they did, I wasn’t paying attention. Hummm. let me restate that, my older son did point out one time, I shouldn’t be drinking and driving.
I noticed that my behavior was effecting them. I would just avoid and ignore them, or yell to leave me alone.
AL likes isolation 3 months ago
yea, Saturday night at home typing on 43 things. 3 months 1 1/2 weeks in.
it becomes trying sometimes… I sometimes wonder how long this will go on. Will I give in eventually ? Who knows, today is today tomorrow is tomorrow. Today I will NOT DRINK
3 months ago
what you were saying to begin with. I was pointing how AL is so controlling over ones mind that we will justify 2 beers is just fine over a 18 day period. Even if you knew your test results at that time or not. The AL is cunning and will wait until you are weak…
My mind constantly tells me, I’m ok to have 1 !
but, I’m not….. 3 months ago
I read your desperation in the post…then you go to say ” I had a few beers during the SuperBowl” I guess your really not that scared.
It so easy to downplay things…and easier when you just give into AL.
I just spent this weekend going through the Chinese New Year. Went to several ‘parties’ and at one, I was even requested to ” BRING THE BEER”. These folks are “drinkers” and I wasn’t to happy about going.
I was offered a “beer” several time. My wife even wanted me to share one with her. I just said, oh, thanks… Then I moved on to socializing with the people who where holding a glass of iced tea, water or even the infant that was there.
My point is do what you have to do…lie ( I had /have one…cheat… ( pour the drink down the drain ) and steal…( your life back ) find ‘new’ non-drinking folks, a hobby etc.
Good luck and I hope your results turn out well 3 months ago
I receive a daily email on local arrest within my Zip code. There are those of us who think it’s ok, to drive putting others in danger. We feel, we have “control” of ourselves and the automobile we drive.
Then when something “happens”.
DUI-CHILD ENDANGERMENTDUI-MORE THAN 0.10%BLOOD ALCOHOLIMPROPER LANE CHANGEPOSS OF OPEN ALCOHOL CONTAINER
In my state you get charged if you have a child in your car.
if you notice the offense is only a lane change.
and they had an open container ( ex. AL in a cup )
NO this is not me! but it could as well have been….
It could as well be you!! 3 months ago
it’s been 3 months since I had a drink, in 2 more days. What is to share? Well, 1st of all remembering why we are choosing to stop drinking. Each time I have a craving, “that missing” feeling or I am feeling deprived and left out (of drinking), I start to have a internal dialogue with myself. Going over the feeling of sickness, the financial cost of doing something stupid, and the recovery from it all. TV and Radio is also helping me keep on track by sharing the “stories” of others who were arrested for doing stupid things while using AL or drugs. DUI, Drunk in public, etc.
2nd – How much my family really need me. While I’m on my own drinking binge I just leave my family emotionally. Don’t really care what they’re doing as long as I’m left alone. I’m drinking and hav’n a good-lo-time. My kids are doing better in school because, I’m there to really help them.
Do you have something to share, please do…because YOU are the 3rd reason why I am where I’m at today ! I need to hear and read I am not alone, sharing your story also helps me. Thank you,
3 months ago
is one thing that keeps (us/me ) going. Thank you for being here!
This ones for your support :)
4 months ago