My computer broke and then I fell into a depression over various things. But now it’s fixed and I am coming back to my own. I’ve let this goal slack for a little while now, but I’m back. I no longer have a gym membership due to financial reasons (part of the depression). But I am going to do what I can.
Good to be back. 2 years ago
I come back here to find these new buttons and this goal. I totally appreciate the anonymity of 43T and would hate to lose it.
I don’t even have a facebook account. I share an ‘anonymous named’ one with Mr. B and have debated whether I want one. It would be messy for a variety of reasons. And I sure don’t want it to be hooked up here.
I have a question: does anyone else know people who spend all their time fbing? I have a friend who doesn’t even like to talk on the phone or get coffee at our favorite cafe anyone because he’d rather fb. I feel like I’ve lost him. It’s odd, and I’m adjusting to letting him go. 2 years ago
First my computer broke, husband’s computers (yes, plural) broke, reduced to using others’ computers for only necessary stuff. Depressing.
But computer is working again.
Also I hit a major depression, which was shocking. I applied to so many jobs, and nothing. Nothing. Not even call backs. I felt like such as failure. All that time in school, actually getting my license, and even went on for IV therapy certification. Not a single response, and nobody would talk to me at the places I showed up. I offered to work for minimum wage, or volunteer. I’ve set my limit for driving to work to a 100 mile distance. Still nothing.
So I shut down, went into a shell. I would read about other people, and how they could work. Why not me? I couldn’t face the ‘you don’t have a job yet?’ again. I don’t have money to fix computer, help my marriage, anything.
But I found this sort of thing is a common occurrence for the chronically unemployed. It’s so hard, cause I’m using to Doing Something. So I’m not alone.
I have been praying a lot, doing more work. I have been doing Byron Katie’s The Work, and it’s helping. I’m trying to live outside my story. I’ve been trying again, to seek a job, but at the same time not letting it be my identity.
This is all I can write today. 2 years ago