<3 God bless you, mommy! :)
How I did it: Finding my soul mate is not something I made a goal out of. It's one of those gifts that just arrived on my doorstep after so many years of struggling. I spent a lot of time knowing myself, and I just became true to myself. People who understand who you truly are tend to gravitate towards you in one way or another.
How I did it: I was the type who liked filling in silences with noise. I struggled with silence because it uncovered a lot of things about me. But later, I learned that silence allows for substantial life introspection and a more deliberate or smart approach to making life decisions.
Here is what I have done:
1. I found a group of silent people that I identified with the most. In my case, I found such stellar examples of silence among the Carmelite communities I went to. I just went there and I spent times in recollections and retreats. Some people go for yoga, but in my case, I tried to learn more about the Prayer of Quiet and used this to enjoy silence.
2.I tied it to a routine that I can do daily. But I also became generous with silence. Recently, I went full blast and I took a 5-day personal silent retreat. It was such an immensely rewarding experience. It's as if all the years of my life converged to make sense in those five days. Silence was able to bring that about and more.
3. It was not easy. My mind was super noisy but it helped that I went for Carmelite literature and talked to people who have experienced undergoing a hermitage or monastic phase of life.
4. Of course, since I am busy working in the outside world, I cannot be a hermit or enter a monastery. But that seed of appetite for quiet is something I carried with me. I found it in brief pauses of the Holy Mass, in a quiet place while I do my work, or even in the comfort of my room.
Sometimes all you need is a chance to taste the goodness of silence and you will really find the time to savor it at every chance you get. Read how I did it… 5 months ago
- Listed my priorities in life. In my case, it was prayer, family, good health, and career. Each day reflected this.
- I experimented different schedules and evaluated which matched my energy levels. Since I am a morning person, I begin at 5:30am and retire at 11pm.
- I varied components to keep it fresh. For example, in my 7pm workout sked, I alternated among the following: gym, belly dance, hooping, etc.
- I established cheat days on weekends to keep me from feeling boxed in.
- I broke the mindset that routine is boring. It is not. It multiplies my time and makes me able to pray, spend time with my family, build my career and develop myself.
...to really find what you want in life and not be affected by what others think. i am really happy for you! :)
=) I’m just so happy to have done this!
How I did it: I was surprised because I did not really consciously strategize on accomplishing this. I first got to know myself and took risks. I participated in activities that I genuinely liked and I found the people there eventually. In fact, even here in 43things I found so many people with similar goals. It's quite hard to miss them when you keep your eyes open. Read how I did it… 5 months ago
I was checking my inbox to cheer on old friends and I found your last message to be about celibacy… I ran out of cheers today, unfortunately. But I am commenting in good wishes instead.
Seems like you gave the manager a good beating. I hope that you are doing well. I’ll drop in again sometime to cheer you on your goals!
A long time of cheer pingpong to non-toxic careers. :)