A fish with many fins

When I retire, I want to live in a farm. I hope I could buy a farm one day. 3 weeks ago

I wish I could find a property where my children could play freely – no noise and air pollution, with lots of space to play. 3 weeks ago

I should do the following:

1. Compile all photos and letters (during courting, married photos, photos with our son, etc.)

2. Compile hospital documents.

3. Get NSO copy of his birth certificate. 3 weeks ago

I will start my son’s mutual fund by next month. I will to invest on both a mutual fund and cost-averaging stocks – where both me and my husband will participate. 3 weeks ago

I dreamed that I waxed philosophical: we only give 10% attention to the present moment.

Then I found myself on the edge of a sea shore. A fierce storm has sent wind and waves pounding me. It almost swept me away.

I realized that I should start thinking and working on my son’s future NOW. This new goal will enumerate the things that I need to do. It will help keep me in perspective. 3 weeks ago

Today is our wedding anniversary. It also marks the day that I found out that I was pregnant. It was a day of jubilation. I was so happy and excited.

Now, looking at my son, it made me understand what life is all about. It is all about love. 4 weeks ago

Everyday I think about it. Why it happened, how did it happened and why did I let it happen. It’s hard to make sense out of it if it is irrational by its very nature.

I figured out that I did it out of immense fear. I wonder why it did it push thru. Was it really meant to be?

I silently suffer. This great grief may be with me forever. But nothing can be done about it except making meaning in the present and the future.

I should be thankful of what I have now and I should be thankful to God of this second chance. I honestly think that I could have ended my life years ago. I should be useful and be able to help other people now that I am still alive. Everything has a reason. 4 weeks ago

I want to play the piano with my son as much as we can. It’s fun and maybe one day he might want to play it too. 2 months ago

There were ups and downs after I gave birth. But I’m sure there are more ups than downs. The downs were quite steep but somehow I managed to surface. Life should go on… especially I have my little angel with me.

1. That I still have a few good friends that I can count on to. I value them so much.

2. My husband who loves me.

3. Still moments that enlighten.

4. For work that keeps me busy.

5. My son who is my everything. 2 months ago

God, my mom told me that my grandma had undergone through what I’ve been through and a grand aunt as well.

My grand aunt had a haunting experience of it that she called a priest before she died.

I am not alone. And my story will be with me until I die.

God, I hope I could go through life. Help me become a better person. 2 months ago

A great reason to live in the present. It reminds me to be happy and to give all the love that I have. 2 months ago

1. An increased tendency to let things happen rather than make them happen.

2. Frequent attacks of smiling.

3. Feelings of being connected with others and nature.

4. Frequent overwhelming episodes of appreciation.

5. A tendency to think and act spontaneously rather than from fears based on past experience.

6. An unmistakable ability to enjoy each moment.

7. A loss of ability to worry.

8. A loss of interest in conflict.

9. A loss of interest in interpreting the actions of others.

10. A loss of interest in judging others.

11. A loss of interest in judging self.

12. Gaining the ability to love without expecting anything in return. 2 months ago

I thank God for this day, that I am still alive, healthy and capable of doing things that I want to do.

I thank God for the greatest gift of all – my son – who will be born about a week before Christmas. I’m also grateful for the manageable pregnancy for the past 8 months.

I’m grateful of my family, my mom who was with me most of the day… for the love that they share with me.

I’m thankful for my mature outlook of the world, with a lot less expectations and despair. Some are meant to be and I try to let them go.

I am also thankful for all the blessings that came to my life. I am committed to share it. I think that’s real happiness. 7 months ago

But I will always find love one way or the other.

First I should find it within myself. 7 months ago

... especially if you did not marry your soulmate.

The love of my life became a lazy, thoughtless brat.

I don’t know how long I can stand this. 7 months ago

Baby, your mom walks funny these days. She wobbles. Hahaha. 8 months ago

Hello! I’m just 2 days earlier than you. My baby is due December 18. :-)

My baby is not as wriggly as the few weeks ago but sometimes I would feel him squirm and see my belly slightly undulating.

I’m happy that you’re having a girl. If mine would have been a girl, i won’t have a problem with her name. But since he’s a boy, my hubby is a lot more excited about listing names (he’s been researching for sometime now). Haha.

Oh by the way, I didn’t gain enough extra weight yet I’m eating a lot (I just gained 8 pounds). But my belly is quite big and I wobble when I walk. :-p 8 months ago

I may be busy during the day but I try to make up to communicating with you in the mornings and evenings.

I usually wake up an hour earlier before I get up. I would ponder about things or I would just quietly touch my belly and feel you. Good morning, baby!

At night, I noticed that you’re mostly active. You would wiggle around or kick. I would cuddle with your dad and make ourselves laugh. We would like to share our joy with you. We love you. 8 months ago

I remember my mom trying to comfort me last night over the phone as I was ranting about being about frustrated and exhausted at work. She told me that I should leave it to fate – if it doesn’t work, it’s not meant for you.

I told her I am not like that. I have never gone this far if I have that defeatist attitude. I have learned how to accept my shortcomings but it won’t make me stop pursuing my goal. I am responsible for my success and failures.

There are things that seem to crush my spirit. I was on the verge of crying but I had to refocus on what I can do, given the few chances that I will redeem myself again.

My soul, however, is hankering to recharge itself. I want to take a break from work and be myself again. 8 months ago

I just had my 2nd trimester ultrasound at 24 weeks and 2 days. What can I say?

Tears were rolling on my cheeks as I see my baby at the ultrasound screen. I guess I was feeling enraptured. I could see a miracle before my eyes: I see how my baby has grown. Indeed, another being is going to be born into this world in a few months.

I was so elated to find out that my baby is normal. The doctor pointed at every body part as I held my breath.

My baby is a boy. I screamed with joy as I looked at my husband.

Oh baby… I’m so happy to have seen you. We’ll be together in this exciting journey. Just hang on there. I love you! 8 months ago

Baby, I’m sorry mommy got so mad at dad today. He’s mean and he has a bad attitude. He keeps on dissing me and my cooking. And he’s not even sorry about it.

One day I’ll cook for you… And I’ll be the greatest cook ever. We’ll spend a lot of time together. And I’ll be loving to you and will do my best to never hurt you. You are precious to me. 10 months ago

Hello, baby. Your bump is showing already. Did you like the mushroom and spinach cannelloni we had for dinner? I hope I could make you one someday. Did you enjoy our lazy half hour just gazing at our plants upstairs?

We’re gonna have fun time when you’re born. I love you! 10 months ago

Since I got pregnant I’ve been choosy with the foods that I eat. I would rather learn how to cook than eat out.

So far I made minestrone, honey lemon sole, made ginger ale, salads, pizza… and tomorrow I’ll make beef stew in tamarind.

I got Jamie Oliver’s big book. I have so much reading and experimenting to do. :-) 10 months ago

- We were able to hire an assistant, after so many interviews. She might not be the best and brightest (the smart one wanted to outsmart me with money) but she seems to be a humble, eager learner… Hope she’ll be a big help when my baby arrives. So much work ahead!

- My dogs, even sometimes they’re annoying (needy and having mess problems), I love them.

- The ginger ale I was able to make a few days ago.

- The yoga towel I bought on sale (it’s time to go back to yoga!).

- For the time that I was able to somewhat deep-clean the house. Thanks for the 7th generation bathroom cleaner. It was awesome!

- The raw mango salad… Its sourness is just perfect for my weird appetite.

- The new cactus bud that grew.

- The yummy mushroom and spinach cannelloni for dinner. 10 months ago

I felt my baby kick yesterday while I was transferring my plants. Maybe my baby is happy that I am happy too.

I just saw a website describing how a 15 week old baby is growing. I’m almost halfway into my pregnancy. It’s amazing!

Baby, I’ll do my best to nurture you. We’re going to have fun in this lifetime. :-) 10 months ago