- the yoga class last Saturday. It’s always a profound experience for me. It always challenges my ego and relaxes my frazzled mind.
- the nice chat I had with my yoga classmate.
- for my dad who fixed our leaky toilet (he’s my Superman).
- our nice dinner at the nearby bistro: mushroom and spinach canneloni.
- my friend’s parents who are my guiding light.
- getting back to playing guitar often (it makes me happy!). 2 years ago
- the yoga class last Saturday. It’s always a profound experience for me. It always challenges my ego and relaxes my frazzled mind.
Yesterday while I was working I listened to Tori Amos’ songs.
I’m surprised that she’s still around and making music. She’s really talented—and a hardworking artist, too.
While I was checking her bio in wikipedia, something dawned on me: she has accomplished a lot… she defied norms and followed her dreams… she had a daughter (when she’s 37) and she has 3 houses in different countries(!).
I’m 32, where am I now? Have I accomplished a lot? Moreover, what kind of legacy am I leaving in this world given that I only have 1 chance to live?
Will there be a chance that I can do something extraordinary? Should it be about big things? Maybe I should go back to my dreams and fulfill my soul’s deepest desires and yearnings. Life is short. 2 years ago
I noticed that if something stresses me out it’s like I’m having a gray cloud over me the whole day.
I should stop thinking about what I can’t change. I should stop working on what I can change. 2 years ago
Sometimes if I look inside I would see what makes me inspired and happy.
Music makes me happy.
I picked up my guitar earlier and I still have it. I fell in love with music in my youth… and playing the guitar makes my young all over again. 2 years ago
I learned today that I should be careful when I speak especially if it has a negative connotation.
I should also be more giving. It’s better to give than to be at the worse end.
I should be more sensitive about other people’s feelings. Asperger’s syndrome is not an excuse. I should try harder. 2 years ago
Because I find it a challenge dealing with people. I think I’m also more sensitive than most people that is why I perceive pain more than average.
So today, I dealt with a person with ego issues. She berated me for being too honest (that what I said embarrassed her). And she even condescendingly told me that I should not post embarrassing remarks in the social networking website.
What should I do? Hmm… I have so many things to do than to dwell on this. If I would be ostracized for being me, let it be. I think my being too frank (yet tactful) has been a perennial problem. I think I’m also too clumsy for public speaking… It’s a learning lesson.
Authenticity serves my soul well… but not for the public. It’s a big theater out there. 2 years ago
So I realized that practice makes perfect – or at least good. I skipped a week of my yoga practice and I have only practiced today. It was not great. My hamstrings are tight and my arms are not as strong. Worse, my core is soft (my belly bulge is showing!).
Same as with the rule of life, if I want best results I should work hard. Yoga should also be my priority. I should make time. 2 years ago
If things quiet down and distractions would not get in my way it would be easier, I guess.
I loved yoga since back then my teacher believed in me and supported me. Now that he’s away, I felt that my yoga practice anchored on him rather than my own personal experience of it. I used to dream about being a yoga teacher too and go to India to study.
Now that things have changed and my work is still the priority, I wonder how can I shift my dreams into reality. Should I just go with the flow and be passive about the things that I need to do or take command of my own ship and drive it to the course of my dream.
Let’s see in a few months or a year. I’m not getting younger. I should take those chances of getting closer to my dreams. It’s never too late.
“It isn’t a calamity to die with dreams unfulfilled, but it
is a calamity not to dream. It isn’t a disgrace not to
reach the stars, but it is a disgrace to have no stars
to reach for. Not failure but low aim is the concern.”
- Benjamin Elijah Mays (1895-1984) 2 years ago
- I have accomplished a lot of work today. I breezed through a bunch of work in the morning and was able to go to my meeting on time (because my client is late too).
- So the stock market was down and I have some paper losses. I’m grateful to have gone through the double dip in October that it made me learn how to manage losses better… and the losses did not felt as bad as back then.
- I was able to help my brother invest in a mutual fund account. He’s lucky to have been able to enter at a bearish rate (hence, it’s cheaper).
- For the reminder that I need to give back. I still have that promise to give donation to a hospital. (I might work on this tomorrow)
- I’m happy to have talked to my parents and brother tonight. I’m grateful for my family.
- I am also grateful for the take-home food for my dogs. I know I spoiled them that they don’t like to eat their dog food anymore. Haha.
- I am grateful for my plants: the new morning glory plants that sprouted from the seed, the small barrel cactus that finally bloomed (it’s scarlet!).
- Grateful for the cookies that I’ve been munching tonight.
- ... for the new lamp I bought.
- I’m also grateful for our old clients who went back to us (side story: she’s pregnant and she’s praying that I’ll get pregnant too soon). :-)
- I am also happy to have accomplished something difficult at work. I hope tomorrow will be the breakthrough.
- I am grateful to have realized earlier that being busy is good. It makes my mind sharp too.
- I am also grateful that my husband’s shop has been finally put up. He’ll be busy for work now (he used to be home most of the time). I’ll miss him though but it’s also good for him and his career. I’ll do my best to help him whenever I can. 2 years ago
My personal meaning of yoga is a combination of an ever-evolving mental, spiritual and physical exercise. A lot of self-awareness and self-control is involved whenever I practice as there are a lot of distractions and wandering thoughts. When my practice deepens, everything else becomes silent except for my breath. A level of maturity has also been obtained as it suppresses or diminishes the ego. These benefits weave into the reality off the mat, i.e., dealing with our everyday lives, our relationships, work, etc. Yoga helps me cope with challenges and lets me look at life in a different way. It also changed the way I eat! 2 years ago
I got the test and it’s negative. I don’t know what to say now. I just want my period to be back and try again. 2 years ago
Okay. I got a job that could be a dream job—I earn as much as I work. I am very lucky indeed! However, sometimes it is just too much.
Maybe I should treat myself once in a while. I think I have not done this for a long time. 2 years ago
It’s been 4 days already since my period is supposed to come. Baby, I hope you’re growing inside me. 2 years ago
I pruned my rapidly growing thunbergia erecta vine. I finally had the confidence to prune it mid-length of the branch (I used to think that this might not work). I’m hoping that it will produce thick foliage (and more flowers) in the future.
I also transplanted my jasmine plant into the big pot. Also hoping that it will grow big and bloom fragrant flowers.
The petite marigold has already formed a dense cover. I snipped a branch and planted into a uniform box (which used to grow my wild fern).
As with the jalapeno pepper plant, it found a new place in the wall-pot in the other room (facing the afternoon sun). I just have to watch for the white flies and aphids.
I also tried to propagate the oregano thru cuttings.
Looking forward to this “green thumb” adventure! 2 years ago
I also planted sunflower seeds and more cosmos seeds!
I also have new plants: purple calanchoe, a purple succulent and cotton candy arboreal plant.
Next: cilantro plants from seeds… and maybe more from the Sunday market tomorrow. 2 years ago
I always have self-talks whenever I practice. I can’t seem to silence my mind. They just sneak in, scurry around, and quietly leave.
In my last practice, I thought that I may not be good enough anymore. I felt ignored by my other yoga teacher. And I also felt that I want to go to other yoga shalas so I could grow.
But this self-talk changed when I saw the other side to this argument: my teacher maybe left me alone because I’m good enough.
So I thought earlier if I could break some rules. I did some poses wrongly and finally I got noticed! My teacher even assisted me to my most challenging pose – the kurmasana.
I also tried to figure out how is it different to practice in a shala than practicing at home. Of course, there are no distractions. All you see and hear are all related to practicing yoga. During my asana practice earlier, I experienced the purest joy from just doing it. I relished in the pain of my unstretched limbs, every breath, every contraction of my mula bandha, the soft landings of my jump throughs… and the achievement of stilling my mind through the audible ujjayi sound.
No more egos or competition between me and other good practitioners and worse – competition within myself. I just let things be. If I can’t do the pose, then there’s next time. No pressure. I’m doing this for the sake of practicing.
I hope I could recreate this mindset when I practice again at home.
I also told my teacher that I plan to get pregnant soon. No more kapalabati, uddiyana bandhas… and jump throughs even. Another challenge to overcome but I have set a different priority. I’ll shelf my plans of being a yoga teacher for now. But I promise to be a yogini forever. 2 years ago
- I am grateful for my renewed health. I’m thankful that my flu did not progress into my perennial chronic bronchitis.
- I am grateful for my work, for the mistakes that I made (no matter how costly) that these made me remember never to do it again, for doing my best to rectify it and the people who helped me…
- for my pets and plants that always cheer me up.
- for the gifts I got this Christmas and Chinese New Year’s
- for the mundane everyday challenges that help me become a better person (yes, dealing with those challenges)
- for my family who loves me
- for my husband who I love dearly. 2 years ago
Mistakes are there to put you to your center and realize that you should never take things for granted. 2 years ago
For 2 incidents in a row, I got bashed.
I’ve been so careless with my work. I’m tired of making excuses and I was wrong!
I’m also not happy with the way I look. I should get myself together and be better.
sigh2 years ago
I sense this yoga club is getting a bit competitive.
I want to be better but I need to have the discipline to practice often. Yes, there’s a lot of work but I should make time.
I’ll just be myself. I don’t need to prove anything. 2 years ago
So far, I’ve planted viola seeds, giant sunflowers (where I don’t know how it will grow in our apartment) and two kinds of zinnias: the regular and petit.
I hope by March and April my garden will be bursting with color! 2 years ago
Let’s see. I’m 32 now. Just after December 8 (Immaculate Conception), I felt that it’s time to have my baby – soon! 2 years ago
My hubby always makes me laugh. I’m so happy to have married him. He may not be perfect but he’s a lot better than other men and he truly loves me so much! 2 years ago
They always remind my of my vibrant youth… my dreams of becoming a rockstar! 2 years ago
For the first time I didn’t feel that bad to rush out from our coffee-talk today. It was all good, catching up from the long holidays.
Sometimes it felt like a drag… talking about yoga all the time, all the smallest nuances. Sometimes they talk about their work, their discoveries, exercise analyses, etc.
But it’s good to have friends. I’m happy to have them. 2 years ago
Since my yoga teacher left, my practice stagnated.
Yoga is still meaningful for me and a constant commitment. I still practice it at least once a week.
As with my discontent, while I was practicing earlier, I felt my tears welling up. It was a humbling experience. I cannot do it alone… whoever I was before, it was because my teacher was there to support and inspire me. He believed and me and saw me grow.
Now, it has become more like a stilling and a strengthening routine. My new teacher seems to be not keen about my progress anymore. Perhaps she was stuck to the idea that I used to be good before.
I have tried a number of things, became good at it but I did not become great. I could have leveled up by joining a teacher training workshop but other priorities sprung up like I’m planning to have a baby this year.
Finding another good teacher may need time, some additional budget, effort, etc. For now, all I have is myself. I should strive harder to be better. 2 years ago
No matter what they say about you, it is you who decide if you let them destroy you.
At first I feel my ego crumble as they look down at me. I am worthless, I am stupid…. And they have to rub it on my face. They will make me feel that I am nothing.
They are feelings after all. I am not worthless, I am not stupid… I am my own person. I am not afraid that this person will take my dignity. I am not afraid of whatever this person thinks of me. He or she is free to do or think whatever they want to but they can not destroy me.
I have gone a long way from where I’ve been to slump to where I am right now. This may have a reason. It could be a sign that I should pay attention to my heart’s desires… What I really want to do in life. Life is too short just for me to be a slave for work and keeping up to somebody’s standards. 2 years ago
Thanks, God, for another year in my life… for the blessings, for the successes, the learnings, friendships and love.
I’m grateful for my family who loves me unconditionally.
I’m also grateful of the opportunities at work… that sometimes is too taxing for me but I’m still viewing it positively. Strike when the iron is hot!
And as a birthday resolution, I have to be consciously and constantly grateful. Be always generous. And that I should enjoy life more. Time is gold indeed. 3 years ago
Thanks for the 32 years 3 years ago