forgive those who have hurt me

in the situation. I think I am moving on. I won’t forget, but I think I have forgiven.

We talked and I didn’t feel angry. We were able to laugh a little about things, although I can see that it won’t be the same as it was before. It’s a little sad, but it’s okay. I’m okay. I’m not angry anymore, I’m not bitter, I’m just… okay.

I’ve grown so much from this experience and I’d have to admit it was the pits and all shades of crazy and painful. But I’m still here, I’m still breathing, and I didn’t let it get me down for much longer than it should.

I can now mark this done! :)

Just like Pablo Neruda said, forgetting is so long. Yet on the other hand I shouldn’t forget too much because I don’t want to commit the same mistakes.

But yes, I am progressing.

This is tougher than I thought.

^{Adriano Gemelli}

I was able to talk to that certain person today and I calmly explained some things without directly saying that I don’t want to be friends anymore. While I was talking, he started doing something else, which just reminded me again why I don’t like having people like that in my life. I had thought it was an important conversation and there I was as if I were talking to myself.

Sometimes I wonder, How ever did I get stuck with such horrible people in the first place? I don’t get the proper respect, do they deserve mine?

I did say that I forgive him and I think that that’s what this boils down to. Now to make those words 100% real and really move on from this. It will still take some time, though, but after what has happened today, I think it will be much easier.

^{“She is going to run away” by Nicole Pietrantoni}

I cleaned out my computer, I erased everything that had to do with this. It was sad, I cried a little, but in the end I felt better, lighter.

That should help. I need to move on.

This was particulary tough today because I was walking around remembering things. :( I’m sad and angry both at the same time but what’s done is already done and I don’t want to go back to that. I think I had given that friendship enough time and patience and enough chances, it’s time to move on.

But some people are harder to forgive than others.