slow down

I am so pleased to say that I have slowed down to the pace that I wanted to. I have much more of a sense of peace on a daily basis. This I am sure has been helped by daily morning pages, centerpointe meditation (just moved to level 2) and exercise. So if I keep with these daily habits, I will be fine.

Only 19 days left to achieve this. I think I am much better than I used to be. If I am stressed at work, nobody knows. I am starting to feel more in control now that I have moved back to UK and feel at home. So I will continue to slow down this month….just need to work on not overworking and getting rid of my list-to-do…

I’ve had a hectic time the last 2 or 3 days working literally 7-11 apart from necessary breaks. Today is the first day I’ve had a chance to get a breather and my husband is also out of town for a day. I still have a certain buzz inside that makes me want to compulsively do things and get them finished, but I’m trying to relax and deliberately do things more slowly…

The solitude helps. I’m enjoying the quiet on my own – I can hear myself better, I’m free to do whatever I want and I feel I have the space to step back and think about what I want do in the coming month.

Now I’m way too slow. I’m not sure how or why. I actually want to get more serious about things and do more towards certain things I want to work on, but I feel too light at the moment. I do the things I have to do but not a lot more. If I try to force myself, I’m not very productive. I feel like there’s not a lot I can do about it. Just go with the flow? I hope I sober up and get faster soon.

I read this poem in a book I am reading called “The 4-Hour Workweek” (great ideas here for reducing one’s workload so one can slow down!):

Have you ever watched kids
on a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Time is short
The music won’t last

Do you run through each day
on the fly?
When you ask “How are you?”
do you hear the reply?

When the day is done,
do you lie in your bed
With the next hundred chores
running through your head?

You’d better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Time is short
The music won’t last

Ever told your child,
We’ll do it tomorrow
And in your haste,
not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,
Let a good friendship die
‘Cause you never had time
to call and say “Hi”?

You’d better slow down
Don’t dance so fast
Time is short
The music won’t last

When you run so fast to get somewhere
You miss half the fun of getting there.
When you worry and hurry through your day,
It is like an unopened gift….
Thrown away…

Life is not a race.
Do take it slower
Hear the music
Before the song is over.

Just got back from tap class. Pink roses on the table, some jazz, dim lights. Outside a wonderful spring evening. Life is beautiful.

and the first time in weeks that I start my weekend with only pleasure and no business in mind. Ah! The sun is shining, the birds are singing. I have a movie and a dinner waiting in the evening (and in a very good restaurant too) and an entire day to spend as I please. Can hardly believe it! I feel so lighthearted and happy :)

I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t even gone to all my dance classes or used my teapot. I haven’t had time to write anything on 43T. Things truly haven’t gone as I planned them to during Christmas holidays and I honestly don’t know what I could have done differently – except be more efficient in my work, which is the one thing that I’m always trying to do and that I always end up feeling guilty about.

Not that I want to complain, because my work isn’t all bad. Why else would I keep doing what I do. But I still wish that somehow I could find a solution to a certain repeating pattern, that I wouldn’t always be running after the latest deadline and would have time to just pause and enjoy the scenery. Like today :)

Happy anniversary to us!

I feel like I am really getting there finally. Since I have been doing my meditation daily for nearly 3 months now, I am so much calmer overall. I have lost that rushing feeling and I know that there is still lots of stuff to do, but it can all wait. Today I am going to go and explore a nearby park which is next to the river and I am going to take my book and lie in the sun!

Since my son was born my life almost can’t be slower. Not that it’s bad – I like it like this. He has his rythm and I have to follow it.
Finally I can appreciate this rythm and also get somre rest out of it.

Walk your own pace to enjoy and experience the world the way you want.

We live only once. Why sacrifice true experience in order to live up to the expectations of others?