http://www.ravenslairleather.com/Main.html 6 years ago
Entries from everyone
I ran across reference to this publication in someone’s LiveJournal:
I was reading Sex for One by Betty Dodson, and was very fascinated and inspired by her descriptions of leading workshops.
I went to a campout this past fall and met Gigi, the priestess of the Temple of Aphrodite. I got a tour of the empty Temple from a friend, but was too inhibited to actually go back when the temple was open.
But…I think it’s important, and there are many facets of me saying “yes” when the subject of Sacred Sexuality arises. I don’t know what that means or what I’m being called to do, or what I can do, but I want to know. 6 years ago
It always makes me sad when I think about the scars and pain and good-intentioned misunderstandings that occur between genders.
Recently in my own life, I turned an online acquaintence down for a date (not someone from this site). He would not take no for an answer—he said he was just what I am looking for, and wanted to know why not. I told him, in as honest but gentle a way as I could. He responded with such a volume of rage that I knew it couldn’t be about me. I am experimenting with feeling compassion for this person and wondering how he got so wounded.
It makes me so sad that we, men and women, are doing this to one another. I know we’re all doing our best, but there’s got to be a better way. I would love to raise the bar a little—to work to create a dating culture that is a little kinder, more honest, easier for everyone, and less about status/money/appearance.
Dating is hard, and people struggle so much with self worth, and with rejection. I would really love it if I never met another woman who doesn’t trust men, or another man who doesn’t trust women. And everyone I dated could form their own opinions of me based on me alone, not every woman they’ve ever interacted with!
OK, maybe we’re veering into fantasy now. But over dinner tonight it was sounding like a fantastic idea for a different kind of online dating site, or perhaps a real-world dating community. 6 years ago
about volunteering. I can’t do it all, so we’ll see who gets back to me first. 6 years ago
FlashAn acquaintence who is leading women's body-image groups wants to talk about doing workshops together
After all, those issues mesh nicely. But I don’t know her well, so getting to know her and where she’s coming from will be the first step. 6 years ago
I think I’ll schedule a series of coffee dates with other sex-positive educators and activists and get some ideas and inspiration for where to go with this next.
We’ll see what Sam, Kathy, Susan, and Shannon have to say. And the usual suspects amongst my friends and mentors, as well. 6 years ago
I added “and gender” at the end. And the first person I’d like to educate is myself.
At the skillshare event I organized last weekend, I was repeatedly asked which gender pronouns I preferred people to use when speaking to or about me. You see, that was one of our ground rules for the conference: that you should never assume you know someone’s gender. Always ask.
No one has ever asked me before which gender pronouns I prefer. When I started thinking about it, I started to feel kind of stubborn. I didn’t want to choose a pronoun, dammit! But our language forces us to choose, we don’t have good choices for genderless pronouns. It’s irritating!
All of the restrooms were transformed into “All-Gender Restrooms” for the duration of our event. Just a little paper sign taped on the door transformed the spaces into something radically different and magical for me. When the paper signs were removed at the end of our event, I felt a pang of sadness to see the restrooms I had been peacably sharing with genetic males, transpeople and others… transformed back into “Women’s” and “Men’s.” And anyone who doesn’t fit into those two categories, again faced a tough choice. 6 years ago
Seeing such community and cooperation, seeing everyone work together to educate each other has given me a huge high. I have been walking around with stars in my eyes all weekend, gushing “I love you guys!” to everyone I see.
I ended up helping with several of the more educational workshops and I learned a lot. There were more than a hundred enthusiastic participants, including a dozen or so who put on spontaneous “guerilla workshops” on a variety of topics.
We made more than enough in donations to cover our expenses, and we can hardly wait until next spring to hold Sexy Spring IV… perhaps we’ll do something in the winter instead. How does Wanton Winter sound?
Oh, and the kissing workshop? I was really nervous, but in the end it got rave reviews from the 20 or so people who attended. So what if we didn’t have a whole lot to say? That left more time for all kinds of fun exercises! 6 years ago
The sexuality and spirituality workshop morphed into something else, presented by someone else. But we’ve had a last-minute cancellation from the person who was to present the Joy of Kissing workshop, advertised in all our schedules. Have no fear, Flash to the rescue! With her trusty sidekick, VeganBoy!
Whatever will we talk about for more than an hour? We have 72 hours to prepare. Perhaps we’ll ask for volunteers from the audience to demonstrate on, mmm! 6 years ago
FlashWhat could be better than working on a sex-positive skillshare and conference that's free for anyone to attend?
Using my design skills to help the conference have a cool look (and having fun doing it)!
(oops, my graphic didn’t load—I’ll have do to this later from work where I have better software) 7 years ago