live in the moment

After an intense few weeks of worrying and entire morning (today) spent in bed, I feel like the fog is lifting.

Here’s what I’ve learned, and I hope to come back to this post when I need reminding:

1. This is me. I am a worrier. Other people worry, too but in different ways. I am who and how I am, I wouldn’t be where I am if I weren’t. Things are not “despite” the way I am…they are part of me. So rather than fighting or berating myself I need to learn to live with self-compassion.

2. The worry will not be cured, but it can be “managed.” On the other hand, sometimes it will just be like that. The amount or number of days might vary, but ultimately they will pass.

3. Worry is just that – it is thinking, considering, and worrying. Worrying is not the facts, it’s about what HASN’T HAPPENED YET.

4. The one thing I do need to manage is how I take it out on my skin. I have to control that, through relaxation techniques or awareness or whatever. Right now my skin is getting better, but I find myself still itching because of what’s in my head (emotional itching!). I can feel the difference between when my body is relaxed and not.

Living in the moment means:

1. Doing that which is the most important thing for me to be doing
2. Correctly choosing what is most important for me to be doing
3. Giving my attention only to the current thing at hand # Not letting thoughts of other concerns, past, present, or future, intrude on what I’m currently doing

Today I intend only to stay relaxed as possible all day. I want to see if I get a better night’s sleep this way. It’s hasn’t been too good all week long.

I’m just doing each thing as it comes up, and keep my mantra close at hand (in mind!). Trying to also stay aware of my body energy, not scratch, etc.

Be calm, relaxed, focused, and happy.

Just be. Be with my kids. Be with nature. Don’t worry about what has to be done next.

Now that I’m graduated college, I’m going to try to do this more by being more spontaneous and willing to try new things and go new places without a care about what other think.

I’m supposed to start job hunting, but I’m pretty much going to take my time and enjoy life before I have to really buckle down and do it.

Living in the moment has a lot to do with flow and concentration.. I often have a hard time focusing on the task at hand, due to other issues or thoughts rattling around in my brain… :) Or just due to physical distractions in general.. [For example—the inanely loud laughing and sneezing guy in the cube next to me!! :)] When I actually sit down and concentrate on what I’m working on, I usually enjoy what I’m doing, get work done pretty quickly, and feel pretty satisfied when I’m finished.

So I guess my issue is getting myself to the point where I can concentrate and feel the flow..

Was listening to one of the “50 pyschology classics” discs in the car on the way to work this morning.. Today’s discussion was about Gestalt therapy. It’s main idea is that when people live in the moment they are free of problems, and that it’s only when people start ruminating over the past or future that neuroses develop. :)Need to read more about this, but at first glance, seems like a good idea to me!!

I’ve been reading some books by Thich Nhat Hanh, and in Peace is Every Step, he makes the point that “We are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living… We have difficulty remembering that we are alive in the present moment, the only moment there is for us to be alive.” He suggests that we come back to the present moment to find peace and joy.

A planner I can’t help it. So I am going to try and stop planning my life, and just live it, and see what happens.