Get through a therapy session without crying

I didn’t cry so much, but I did admit to how very low I am feeling again.

We talked a lot about expectations and achievement, perfectionism and judgements.

But I did cry!

I won’t cry this Monday (but then she is away so I have no session :P)

I am pathetic.

I cry over nothing.

Ugh!

This week I cried just because….

I hate that I do.

I feel like C is being very ‘real’ with me lately. I don’t know if this change is because of my leaving the day hospital, or because of our shared experience of losing Tony. Again today she offered real examples and her own experience which is something she never used to do. It makes me feel closer and more connected to her, which feels good and scary at the same time.
She raised a lot of interesting points today and made me really think about what it is about my emotions that scares me.
I did cry :(

we talked about Tony today. I felt my sadness and pain, and admitted to it. Big stuff. I felt like C validated my feelings though, and understood what my relationship with Tony meant to me.

I shed about 6 tears. All very low key, so I hardly felt like I cried at all, but at times I could have done. I am being hyper-controlled at the moment and that’s mainly what we talked about. But in many ways it was comforting and reassuring to se her this week, now I have left the group programme. And I felt like she was really with me in the session and talking quite honestly with me. It was important today.

Not only did I break my heart, but I spent much of the 50 minutes hiding behind my hands. I am pathetic1

I did cry. But only tears, not all out sobbing!

The site was playing up so I couldn’t update. I cried. I manages some composure for a while, then sobbed as usual. Tomorrow is another day…

Lets see how tomorrow goes…