I am not sure whether it fits under this goal, but in a certain way it does.

For the first time in my working life, I excused myself from a major important process while it is still going on. It’s a complicated process with a lot of difficult actors and I got quite a bit of status out of it. On the other hand, the process has many similarities to an abusive relationship, with one of the main actors putting me down (majorly and publicly) and then telling me how great I am from one day to the next.

So, I have decided to drop the whole thing and wrote my boss that I am now longer available to deal with this process and that I think it should be taken over by someone else. In a sense it feels like giving up – I wasn’t strong enough to cope with it, I am weak so I ran away from it. On the other hand, I think I need to protect myself from abusive behaviour (no one else does it, even though they are quite aware) and there is nothing to gain here. So maybe I giving up is the right choice, a strong choice.

Whether it is weak or strong, it is taking my life in my own hands, which means taking responsibility for how I live and how I feel. This was not what I originally meant with this goal, but maybe it fits. 8 months ago