Trust God more and more!

I have got to work on my relationship with God! I tend to go through cycles and I’m not happy with my relationship with him currently.

Must remember to Pray throughout the day and thank him when he bestows blessings!

My girlfriend attends a non-denominational church about an hour away and twice this month I’ve gone with her and our gaggle of kids.

It’s amazing to go to a place of worship that is actually fun. I mean no disrespect to any other religion or service.

They have classrooms for the kids separated by ages. For the first time ever, my oldest Cherub begged to go back to church!

I loved that before and during the service they played contemporary Christian songs that you would hear on the radio. Communion was open to everyone (since I’m not baptised, I’m not allowed in the Catholic service). They handed out bibles to follow along to the service.

The two services I went to had sermons that were very relevant to me and deeply moving. I cried during most of them, but it felt very freeing.

Actually, I am looking forward to going back.

From www.Bible.com:

“The Bible is filled with admonitions against being dishonest and lying. One of the Ten Commandments states: “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour.” Exodus 20:16

Before we point our finger at another for being a liar that we feel God needs to deal with, let us examine our own lives to see if we are infected with the same disease. What kind of witness are we to those around us? Are we deceived and have we become liars ourselves? Let us first give a definition as to what a lie is according to Webster’s dictionary:

1.) To make a statement that one knows is false, especially with the intent to deceive.
2.) To give a false impression or action or false statement, especially with the intent to deceive.
3.)To make a false statement in order to evade the truth.
4.)The invention of a false story or excuse in order to deceive.

Perhaps for a Christian, a Biblical definition of lying could be summed up in this statement: Any time our word does not agree with God’s Word.

We need to ask God to cleanse our hearts and begin reading and studying the Bible so that His Word resides in our hearts. As we keep His Word and water it with prayer it will produce good fruit in our lives.”

This is very humbling to me, and I appreciate the opportunity to do this and be a more honest person and serve Him better

I’ve gone to churches (usually for some reason in the big cities) and tried to pray during non-Mass times. Usually they are locked, even some Catholic churches.

So today, I felt the urge to go and have some good ol’ pew time. And yippee skippee – they were open, and had plenty of open seating.

^{(I sat in the back, no need for a great view)}

I thought it would be a quick trip ~ but I stayed there an hour and a half, which amazed even me that I had that much to say and hear.

I tried to meditate and just be, and I think I did a good novice job. Usually I have other things creep in to my thoughts, but this time it was more focused.

It was a nice peaceful visit and I think I’ll add a goal to help support this endeavor.

I really do get so much spiritual refreshment from Church. It always surprises me that I come up with excuses not to go.

Some weeks can be boring and a little off topic in my life, but more times than not, I get a lot of joy from it.

This week, it was spot on in what I needed to hear. I’ve been praying a lot lately. I’m normally not the praying type… ^{don’t want to bother the big Guy…} but I’m trying to stop seeing it that way. Lately, I’ve been feeling guilty that I might be actually praying too much, which I’m sure is actually funny to God.

Today’s Mass was about how God wants us to pray without becoming weary.

I pulled this from the net (bless Google!) about the 29th Sunday in Ordinary Times (today ;o) so that someone else’s version could explain it better than I could:

Luke says that God will not be “slow to answer” our prayers.God does answer our prayers speedily, but sometimes we don’t see the results as soon as we like.That is where the challenge of faith comes in.Faith tells us to keep praying when we don’t seem to see any result.

So, I’m off the hook, I can pray as often as I like! WooHoo!

Thank you God

;o)

For some reason, my weeks have been muddled and crazy. Not in a “ohhh I’ve got a papercut way”... more like a “OMG we need the top surgeon STAT”. Or at least that’s what it seems like.

I was actually feeling a bit sorry for myself last week as I was having challenges with a crazy chain of events with my daughter’s school.

But then, I looked forward to the weekend. And boy, did I have a great weekend! Then about a 1/3 (or maybe 1/2…can’t really tell, they seem like 2 totally different weekends now), things took a turn for the worse.

I had been asking for God for his guidance in the situation from the beginning, but the outcome wasn’t anything like I anticipated and threw me for a loop.

I didn’t mind the situation, but apparently the situation minded me in it… LOL! So, I was confused, heartbroken, sad, angry and not very Jennalicious-like.

Well, today I felt an inner peace about the events and stopped the crying and resolved to focus on the happy memories and give the Cowboy the benefit of the doubt and move on.

In rushhour traffic on the way home, I seemed to have forgotten this and resumed the angry mind set. It actually did me more harm then good.

I am thankful that God has given me back my inner peace with a strong resolve to overcome the recent challenges. I may not have agreed with what happened, but if I subject myself to reliving it I will only suffocate myself.

One of the greatest compliments I’ve received recently was “I have never ever seen anyone as happy as you were”. Well, that’s the Jennalicous way! Thank you for noticing ;o)

Thank you God for the strength and will to go after this again with vigor.

And I just have such a hard time wrapping my mind around the God-idea. I know it’s probably sacreligious to talk/write like that, but then the other half of me says ‘if you can’t be honest about this, what can you be honest with?’...

Anyway, I’m trying to live a life that is religious, however I fail miserably daily. My priest tells me that that is normal and nothing to worry about, but it still distresses me and wears me down at the thought.

I would love to actually take theology courses and get to the deep inner workings of the Bible. I want to go somewhere where I can ask a million questions to experts and not feel ignorant as I read. The bible I have is the New American Version, and it’s still difficult to understand a lot of the time.

But I guess, this is why it’s one of my goals… to delve deep and have my questions answered and find the trust that I’ve been hoping to find.

Went to Church today, the first time in too long, and the sermon was talking directly to me.

It illuminated a conversation I had on Friday with my best friend. The conversation was a blessing, and hearing the Church’s message of what God thinks about it really convicted me of the path I need to be on.

Thank you God for showing me the way :o) I hope to fulfill your purpose for me.

Post Mass I ran into a Priest I haven’t seen in about a year and he remembered all about my family and said how happy he was to see us and would look forward to seeing us back weekly. He even blessed Jessie’s broken foot ;o). Thank you Father!

Some days I don’t feel like I have the things I need (support, time, energy, X, Y, Z…) and lately life have been coming at me in hyper speed, when I was really ready for the drama to be getting better.

But today, in asking God for X, I not only got it, but in receiving this blessing, I was overcome by such peace of mind and a renewal of hope. Exactly what I need to get back on track and deal with all the other things.

Thank you God for carrying my burdens again for me and for helping me to carry them for myself while still standing tall.

Please help me raise my precious angels to see your light and look to you. Please continue to help me keep them safe and healthy. Please keep me sane during the difficult times and grateful during the times of blessings.

.. I am a bit surprized that no one has wanted to do this but me!