We’re not pinning down a date or anything, but in small convos, we’re kind of figuring out what we both really want and when and going off of that. I do want to actually go places next year, as that didn’t work out this year, and we need to get our own place, wherever and whatever it will be, but we’re serious about it. I mean, c’moon, I asked (newly pregnant) married friends of ours if they’d thought of any names or had any talks with their parents and they looked petrified! In the meantime, strange people that we are, J and I had picked out specific names for possible future children like within a year of dating, before we were even engaged! Actually, within a few weeks of dating, I told him that I’d gladly marry him and have his children, completely meaning it even though I was way a career oriented college girl at the time, and he wasn’t weirded out a bit, just lashed and said I’d have to wait a while before that happened!! So you see, this has been a very long time coming, about 6 years or so, and it will be at least another year yet I’m sure, but yeah…. 2 weeks ago
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Or a financially sound time, or a safe time. But J and I have always wanted a family of our own, even before we got together and dated and got married. And I wanted to wait a few years and have him to myself, but it’s been almost 4 months already, and everything is pretty much the same as it’s always been, except stronger and secure and happier, but otherwise, we haven’t really changed. We want to go out and do things, and have fun, but with time and money constraints, it’s hard. And ever since I’ve been young, I’ve wanted nothing more than to be a mom. Sounds dumb, but it’s true. And at least I’ll have accomplished something that matters to me in my life, instead of this long line of rejections and struggles that all felt so forced in the first place.
And yes, I have many, many friends and relatives who have children, and I see their struggles and sacrifices and hear their complaints and worries, but so I’m not walking into this brainwashed that children are perfect little angels that never grow up. I work with them, play with them, am an aunt to some…so when J told me that we may finally have some relief, the first thing that flew into my mind was that yes, finally, we can actually start seriously thinking about a family of our own. And I was just so happy :-) 3 weeks ago
... where we’ll spend a lot of time & money and will undergo the IVF.
Sometimes a woman who wants a child badly is very tough to live with. It’s like a tank who just goes on and on towards her goal. Totally trampling the feelings, schedules and the entire life of the others.
Any mentioning about money makes her hysterical. “You don’t love me. All you care is money. You are disgusting. How do I live with you”. That from someone who doesn’t work for several years already, doesn’t even attempt to do housework, doesn’t speak language and doesn’t drive a car. Lovely. 4 weeks ago
... is a difficult virtue when all you hear about at home, is IVF, periods, ovulation, sex, fertility appointments, fertility medicines, ££££ payments for IVF – for which you will have to take a loan, along with another ££££ payment for a stupid, whimsical, just a few days long but costing like a world cruise, break in exotic country, which will delay your getting in the black for at least 2 months.
... and she talks to her friends on the phone—one who just has undergone IVF, and is pregnant but broke up with her husband so is unclear of what further, so yours happily supports her… depriving your of her attention.
... suddenly you do 150% know the meaning of a Latin expression “ad nauseatum”. 1 month ago
My wife cried when she learned that her best friend who’s been trying for years to conceive, is now one month pregnant. But we all know it’s through IVF and cost the lady £7000 or thereabouts.
I do have the funds, but if possible, I’d rather do it naturally. Why pay when you can do without? 2 months ago
Overstimulation probably is the cause of stabbing pains for her… So had to take my wife to A&E last night. 1 am to 4:30 am, not much sleep left, as GP was due at 8:30am. I chose to walk the dog after the GP, thus winning myself extra 30 min of sleep…
Sitting at work a bit groggy, but it’s not the first time, aye. 3 months ago
Near impossible to get an appointment with our NHS fertility clinic doctor: the clinic is only 6 days a month and there’s huge waiting list. She said we should ring and email her. Well I did both and to little effect. Grrrr.
And there are awful things happening; last night I was woken at 5 o’clock, by blaring music and a string of unprovoked abuse; and then, a glass of water was poured in my bed, narrowly avoiding iPad and iPhone, quietly charging at my bedside. Then, she ran down, took the knife and tried to stab herself – and I had to wrangle it out of her hand…
Must say I was really, really pissed off as 4-6 am is my strongest, mightiest power sleep; miss that and I’m a zombie for the day. It took me 2 hours to calm down the fighting, shouting, Devil-possessed creature my wife had turned into. Eventually she returned from the claws of Devil to her usual self, looking totally lost and pathetic, and went to sleep on my shoulder.
As a result we overslept for church :( shame, we both wanted to spend some time with the parishioners and the Vicar.
In the morning, she asked what happened :( she had a very faint idea of that. She was terrified by my story which had no exaggerations.
When will this shit end?..
I have an awful feeling that medicines might have nothing to do with this outburst. 3 months ago
Medication has vast side effects and next time we see this doctor, we’ll tell her. Problem is that the clinic is only 6 days in a month, and I work in London now, so no easy way to get to her. But I’ll try. I really feel for my wife about these aftereffects of the fertility drugs :( 3 months ago
The medicines make her dizzy and feel drugged. No easy way round this, huh?
She’s taking them nevertheless, and in a week’s time, we’ll start actively trying. So far everything goes as predicted.
Step by step… 6 months ago
Wife has taken the medicine for 7 days, and then stopped as directed. Now it’s time for second medicine, and keep trying.
Why does everything have to be that difficult?.. No point in reflexing over it.
“Just keep on going, keep up the rowing, keep up the rowing…”6 months ago
My fertility test done, so far no negative feedback.
My wife has been prescribed a medicine to stimulate her reproductive system…
Soon to start trying with the boost. 7 months ago