care about my appearance

I’m fifteen and I don’t even know how to apply eyeshadow or lipstick properly. My mom never taught me and I don’t really feel comfortable asking her. Everything I know about being a girl I learned from the internet or sex ed. Even my little sister knows more about caring for her appearance than me. This goes for my older brother too. It sucks being the middle child. Thank god I know how to shave!! Though I only really started shaving my legs two years ago.

I have been trying to put makeup on now and shaving my legs frequently (lol) even if my man isn’t around. feels nice.

It’s kind of funny how dating someone will force one to care about their appearance. I am enjoying spending a little more time on myself though, which is definitely helping me keep up the momentum for this one.

I’ve realized that I’m actually quite attractive. No one knows though because I don’t care enough about how I look to show it. I throw my hair up and out of the way, I wear baggy sloppy clothes, I don’t worry about the little details of my appearance, I just make sure I’m cleanly and generally presentable. That’s just not good enough for me anymore. I need to look good, if not for my own self confidence then because more people will notice me. I’ve realized that caring about how one looks is not being vain.