Pray for my Mom,(again) because they found something in her body from yesterday's PET/Scan!

The wake was last evening and many people showed up to offer their respects. This morning we had a brief ceremony at the Greek Orthodox church and drove to the cementary.

While a friend of the family had bagpipes play, the Navy Commander and Yoeman carried a flag which was folded and presented to my father. It was a beautiful and touching ceremony with our pallbearers carrying her to our final resting place.

We celebrated the passing with a traditional Greek style dinner of fish, rice, wheat and baklava. The priest read a prayer before the meal and we thanked all who came today. Amen.

I want to thank all the wonderful people who sent cheers, hugs, greetings, prayers, psalms, once more. Thank you so much as you have made this chapter in my book of life more bearable.

I would like to send a virtual prayer for my mom.

Mom, You lived a good life, we all miss you, Dad and Deborah and her family, Diana and I, want you to know that we all love you and you were a great and loving mom. Deborah and I will take care of PaPo so don’t worry. We love you very much.

((((((((((((((((((huggs))))))))))))))))))))))

Love,

Diana and Your Son George :)

My family and I have decided to have hospice take care of my mom! I don’t want her to go into a nursing home, neither does my sister. So, with a friend from the Susan Komen 3 day Walk who is handling the initial arrnagements, they are scheduled to obtain a hospital bed, table, nursing care, etc. to make my mom comfortable as possible.

Have we done all we could with the radiation and chemo? I think we have, the women is 81 years and is a rel fighter however, now she has to rest and not be in constant pain and suffering. I would want the same treatment if the cancer spread so fast and to so many different places as it has in so short a time.

We can not get her to the Cancer Center for chemo treatments and I really believe this is best. Why should she suffer from the chemo at her age and her ill health? She can not even get out of bed by herself anymore. God, I pray that she will not suffer anymore. Please help my mom. Her ailing kidneys, her pnemonia are contribute to our decision.

I want to express my heartfeld thanks to everyone who has even thought about mom, if you don;t pray, you still sent a well wish, I could not of asked for more praise, help, psalms, than from the many friends on 43 things, well done people, you are all on my lifetime “love my friends” list.

((((((((((((((((((((huggs))))))))))))))))))))

peace and Love.

Happiest New Year 2007,

George :)

I cried today while talking with my sister, a social worker and a therapist at the Cancer Center about my mom,
I cried when we signed the orders to admit my mom to hospice when she comes home.
I cried when they asked me about DNR and “do you want your mom in a nursing home?”
I cried with my sister, I cried in the social worker’s office and I am crying inside, right this very moment while writing this.

I cried praying to God to stop her pain and suffering.
I cried on Christmas Day when the pain was so bad she just told me, “George, I need to go to the hopsital.”
I cried when her feet swelled up and the pain was so bad that she had already received her pain medication,
I cried when I could not help her down the stairs this morning and had to call 9-1-1 because we didn;t know what else to do.
I cried in the emrgency room, I cried, I cried, I cried.

They told me not to cry when the surgeon in Boston told the three of us, “I can’t do anything for your mom.”
I cried when she wakes up at night and just wants me to stay with her, before she falls asleep.
I cried on the phone, I cried whenver I think of something sad, I cry at some movies, don’t tell me I am weak, don’t tell me I am less than a man, don’t tell me I am wrong for wanting to cry because she will be gone soon, maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, maybe next year but I can still cry for her if I want to. It helps me to deal with the pain and is such a powerful and over whelming emotion to control that it’s almost impossible not to just, “have a good cry.”

My mom , dad sister and myself went to day to see the surgeon oncologist. He took a look at the PEt/SCANs and the reports, the skin squamous cell cancer spread onto from her neck now its on her chest cavity. She may even cancer cells in her left arm.

He told us the saddest thing a surgeon can tell a patient is that he can not do anything for her, the cancer has spread and is not localized in one area, it’s not like one golf ball sized tumor to be removed, it’s everywhere! he recommends chemo therapy, as the radiation may not be effective treatment anymore.

I cried with my mom who told my sister and I “well, I lived a good life, take care of each other and your father, what ever happens, happens.” I tld her that I haven’t given up, there is a miracle somewhere and we need to find it. Then I cried some more. I told them, it’s okay to cry as they were telling me not to cry because of this.

Again, thank you all for your unrelentous support, affection, prayers, psalms and well wishes. I still have hundreds of 43 things email to answer and won’t get to those until later this week. Now, we have to help install another hot water heater for my parents house. Bye. Happy Holidays.

Peace and Love,

(((((((((((((((((((((((huggs)))))))))))))))))))))))

George ;)

because the entry is confusing and I will open up this goal under a different title. It’s not my mom but Geo58’s mom and she can use all the prayers and thoughts in the world.

I have decided to be with my mom full time until we beat this cancer thing. I may not respond back here on 43 things until I move my pc so please bear with us.

The past couple of days including Christmas and Christmas eve have been challenging. My mom is in constant pain, she has been taken off Vicadin and replaced it with oxycotone? Even her anti biotic s have been replaced. We are exhausted from lack of sleep and rest. She is up constantly almost every hour and calls my name to walk, sit up, relieve her pain and suffering or just to go to the restroom. Her left arm is swelled up, they want her to take mineral oil for the constapation, protonix for her gas, stoll softners, etc. and she is still constapated which may be her major problem with her pain. The cancer gorws and I even noticed a large black colored stain on her stomach, is this a visual sign of stomach cancer?

God, I prayed, and cried for hours in between Christmas eve while watching the 24 hour Miracle of 34 th street wating for a miracle to have God remove her cancer from her body. Then, she would call my name and I would have to take care of her.

I feel exhausted, insomnia and confused to what we can do. On top of all this their hot water tank let go and we have a small pool of water in the basement. Hopefully, we can get a replacement hot water tank for my parents tomorrow or is it today? No hot showers though. Thanks to all the prayers, concerns, pslams, thoughtful cheers and praises for my mom. THank you and hope you Christmas holiday was bright.

Peace and Love,

(((((((((((((((((((((((((huggs))))))))))))))))))))

Love,

George ;)

Today was a bad day for my mom. She was in a lot of pain and I think the vicadin is not working as it should plus, she has an infection under her arm and the visiting nurse is playing games with the surgeon in gatting my mom an anti-biotic. Oh yes, it’s the holiday season and everyone wants to be out in parties but, I am mad as hell right now because she is in so much pain. Shoudl I be like this, maybe not but I have a right to vent about this don’t I. I am sorry it’s jus thow I feel. All day and all night long I see a strong healthy women of 81 years and now she is always in pain. I hate this cancer, I really do hate it!

My mom had a very difficult week. She has been a lot of pain and difficult to make it up stairs sometimes. It appears after she takes her pain medication, vicatin, she has some problems with her balance and fatigue, she’s tired. So my Dad and I help her sometimes to go up and down the stairs.

Yesterday, she went for testing and radiation, they found a large hole underneath her armpit and called the surgeon’s office to examine it. The surgeon told me it was very sore and stuck a gauze pad with saline inside and placed some gauze on the outside of the wound. She was in much pain when he stuck that gauze inside of her, ouchhhhh, ummmmm, ^pain

The visiting nurse came today and changed her dressing, I cleaned the refirgerator as it needed to be. While we were wating for the nurse, my Dad was driving to get some of my mom’s first aid supplies and stool softner from the drug store. She asked me why I was cleaning the refrigerator so much, (I took out all the drawers and cleaned it top to bottom) She then said I must of been nervous, which I was. Not the right thing to tell her, as my Dad couldn not sleep last night, which is very unusual as he goes to bed before 9:00 PM every night. But last night, he came downstairs and I was there too. He told her he was worried about her.

So, this afternoon, she started to cry, and my mom doesn’t do this very often, except a few times this year. She said, “take care of your father if anything happens to me.” I told her we will, that’s when she started to cry and I tried to console her, so I felt like crying with her too.

My mom must be one of those people who are tough to pain. Babe Ruth died from cancer in his neck I believe. Lou Gehrig died of his own disease. I don’t want to say my mom was as popular as those sports figures, no but just want to say how tough she is to the pain and suffering she must be going through.

Last night I saw this pain. She was in bed trying to sleep. She had a busy day at the Cancer Center. She complained about her pain on Sunday and just took tylenol. She suffered without letting my sister and me know until Monday morning, so I took her and they gave her some vicatin, she only took one and it was not enough. So, I told her too take 2 of these. It lasted until 9:30 PM and then she triued to sleep. She awoke at 2:00 AM and she took 2 more, the pain was that severe.

My biggest fear is that she is so tough that it may take this awful disease to stop her, but she has not stopped yet. She has gone through heart disease and a quadruple bypass, diabetis, high blood pressure, cholestrol, arthritis which allows her to walk with a cane, she walks slow but goes up and down her stairs. She won’t let us put in a lift because she doesn’t want to be an invalid. I just hope that God has not called her number and the only way to stop her is by introducing her to cancer for the third time, she’s beaten it twice before. Rest, mom, gather your strength for the battle wages on, the battle inside her body. God bless her.