be a good example to my children

...and decide just what exactly it means to be a “good example”. Being a “good example” is like saying “I’m fine” or “It was interesting”. It’s about the same as saying nothing at all.

So. Okay. Being a good example means taking advantage of situations where they do something wrong to teach them what’s right instead of getting mad. For instance, when one has pulled all the books off the bookshelf – again – and made a mountain of them all over the floor, instead of getting mad that there’s now one more friggin’ mess I gotta clean up I use it as an opportunity to teach about how we clean up after ourselves. It’s not as easy as it sounds, ‘cause it sounds pretty simple. And it’s really easy to get mad.

It means being patient, loving and kind while not taking any shit. Delicate balance.

It means showing respect to them, and showing them how to respect others.

It means showing them the value of curiosity, adventure, it means getting up off my ass and showing them how to take advantage of what life has to offer.

It means doing what you say you’re going to do.

It means STABILITY.

Hell, this is going to be HARD. LOL

I try to keep this one in mind and generally I think I’m okay at it. I have the usual behavior patterns that make me feel guilty – I don’t read to them often enough (I think), don’t take them to the park often enough, am too busy & tired & frazzled by the end of the day to really enjoy being with them without being distracted by how messy the house is or how many chores remain undone. Basically, I’m too stressed-out to really enjoy much of the time I spend with them, which is a crying shame.

There is one thing that’s right, though, and that is that neither one doubts how much mommy loves him. Maybe (I hope) that’s the most important thing.