Learn to trust the right people.

I may be too young to be worrying about these things, im 14, but it’s really pissing me off. My mum has been stabbed in the back soo many times, it hurts when i remember it. She’s basically been telling me that the only person you can trust in the end is yourself. This may be true, i dont know, but i feel as if not everyone you know is a selfsih person, there has to be some people that you can rely on and talk to.
I have soo many worries in life, it’s literally burning my head up and im getting so angry and annoyed at the smallest thing. And when the anger becomes apparant, i feel guilty immediately.
Is this common? I really just want some one to talk to and relieve myself on all these fears and doubts of myself. Maybe I’m not confident enough. Maybe I’ve lost my trust completely. (though i doubt it).

I wear my heart on my sleeve far too much. I’m too soft and people know this and take advantage of it. Been stabbed in the back several times. Spent too much energy on the wrong people when my real friends have been neglected.

ive made that mistake again!! am i so terible that i bring all this shit into my life? i want a simple, uncomplicated life for now. i didnt before but im ready now. im being good. on my very best behaviour. i couldnt actually be better. im easy going now, i dont complicate things. i dont stay angry. i let it go. but im so done with feeling let down. i just wont have faith in anyone anymore. wont take things so seriously. although i tried that last night and and it didnt really work out so well…. i took a break and now i want to get back into the social scene, but everyone expects me to be who i used to be. but ive grown up. ive changed.

i had a rough weekend. im just confused and need to say something. even though its just to a computer screen.

its a really difficult thing to do. when you’ve done it so often and taken people for face value, only for them to hurt you and abuse that trust. i cant let myself open for that again.