Ask for help when I need it

I know it’s stupid and one of those old things that most people grow out of. But not me. And even though im 16 years old. Im mature and independant and grown up. I still have a problem with asking for help. I still have a problem with making myself more vulnerable than i already am. So im short and weak and sensitive and overly emotional and shy. Do you really think i need, ontop of all that, to announce more of weaknesses to the world. But thats the thing. I don’t even see the problem in asking for help. Some of the strongest people ive ever met are constantly asking for help. Over and over and over again people drum into you that it’s okay. that everyone needs a little support sometimes. That no one can go through life on their own. I know that. I agree with that. So why can’ i do it?. I sometimes feel its got something to do with the way i was raised. I love my parents and everything. But i can see major flaws in the way they brought me up. Im still to afraid to show my emotions to my father. That’s sick. I am actually scared of crying or being angry infront of him. Because “crying is a sign of weakness”. Because “showing people your emotions just gives them the upper hand”. What kind of lessons are they to teach to your child. And even though ive been able to shake off most of the bad things that have been ingrained into me. I still can’t seem to shake this one. And it’s unhealthy. I bottle all my emotions up. I can’t open up to hardly anyone. I can’t ask for help or express my weaknesses. And sometimes it swings the other way. At home, im forced to hold in everything. I can’t talk about it, or cry about it. I just have to get on with it. And so sometimes when im away from homes im either incredibly closed and careful in controlling my emotions. Or im the complete opposite. I’m a mess. Everything that’s been bottled up, comes bursting out all over whoever is insane enough to stay with me through this. All the anger and tears just come at once. And im an emotional wreck.

How am i suppost to get over something like this?

This is a hard thing for me to do. I always think I should handle things on my own. Most often, when I do ask for help, I get it. I also have trouble accepting help when it is offered. Not sure how to work on this, until I actually need help. Maybe doing some research on the net?

Sometimes you actually get it. I know – I’m SHOCKED!!!
Yesterday was a really tough day for a lot of reasons. I came home and needless to say there was more frustration – so after a long day of this p/t gig I had, I went on one of the social networking sites that I belong to and in no uncertian terms said “I need a job!”. Well I poured my heart out and asked for leads, advice, anything anyone wanted to share.
OH MY GOD!!!
As of 30 seconds ago (it’s 6:14pm – less than 24 hrs later) I have over 280 hits on my resume profile and recommendations/leads and good wishes from 20 people. I can’t believe it. I guess it pays to put pride to the side and say…I need help. You might be surprised…they just might.

I have such a difficult time asking for help. I have to accept the fact that I cant do everything on my own. I feel like an inconvience when I have to ask others for help. I feel “stupid”, like I should be able to do it on my own. WELL sometimes I cant, it’s just not possible. I should be grateful when others are there for me. This is something I really do need to work on, I need to change the way I feel about seeking help.

Work makes this goal pretty easy to accomplish. A year into this job, there is still so much to learn. Each day there is the possibility of being confronted with a situation that is unlike any situation I have previously handled.

In my personal life, I was a assigned a mentor when I joined Toastmasters. I’ve had one conversation with her. It might be in my best interest to figure out how she can help me and then ask for help.

I’ve been asking for LOTS of help lately. Mostly from Donald. He is attempting to be equal to the task. I’m glad that I’ve finally been clear about what I can give right now and what I can’t … and what I expect from him based on his stated intentions. We’ll see what happens.

On other fronts, my friends have been remarkably supportive and have offered all kinds of help. Mostly there’s nothing they can do, since I’m well taken care of by my family … but I do love them offering.

I am so bad at asking for help when I need it, however I always offer help!

It is a very human thing to offer and receive help. I need to remember that letting someone help is actually giving them the gift of giving. This is true, as I enjoy helping others, so why not let others enjoy that too?

I am also realising that if you don’t ask you don’t get. I am trying to stop being embarrassed when asking for help.

I just asked two friends to help me take care of stuff that I just am too far away or too tired to do. They’re little things that I’ve been putting off, but they’re important things, and I hate waiting to get stuff done that affects other people. It feels great to ask for help, and I am sure they will both be glad to do it. Yay!

I made NB help me move all of RB’s boxes into the wine cellar today. I moved eight of ten by myself, and just was too tired and wimpy to lift the last two super-heavy ones. This was not easy to do, since asking NB for anything generally bugs him and isn’t something I think I should have to do … but I’m glad I didn’t break myself hauling around the boxes, too.

This past week has been all over the place. The first couple of days I found out that I got a 53% on a test in Chemistry. I was so distraught that I thought I was going to burst into tears right then and there in class. I knew people were dissapointed and my grade wasn’t even the worst of the bunch.

So I did just as this goal suggests and went for as much help as I could in order to take a retake. And I think it worked out for me. I’m able to approach my Chem teacher now, as scary as that may be. But he’s a good guy and he let me retake it. He knows I’m dedicated because I always ask for help on questions, and I’m starting to in class and stuff.

The test comes in play now though. When I don’t understand something NOW, I need to ask NOW not LATER.