Got poorly, still waiting to hear what it may be, serious, not serious, don’t know. But god it is the first time I HAVE TO ask for help as there are things I cannot do anymore, or struggle, and this hurts..
Not sure whether is the fear of showing vulnerability, pride, lack of humility.
Have always been so self-reliant, so resilient, so wrapped up in myself and now its my own body which forces me to go and reach out, without me having a choice anymore. I have shut up all those voices inside who wanted me to reach out all those years, and now here I am, not completely alone but stuck in being able to ask. It is scary, I don’t want to swamp people, I don’t want to look needy. Mmmh, bit of pride, definitely.
Not sure about what would help me to ask for help – and not feeling completely like falling apart or inferior. Maybe being clear about what I need would help, and putting the request out without feeling like there is something wrong with me. And not putting the other person in a power position, which will make me loose my thinking even more, and probably make the other person uncomfortable. Well, that’s a start.