With “Keep negative people out of my life” or “learn to say no.”
But I broke up with this kid a few weeks ago (actually, we never dated, but it feels like a break up) and I know it’s for the best, despite the fact I usually feel like an awful person afterward everyyyytime I end it with somebody when it never even started in the first place.
Like most guys, he fell incredibly fast and hard when I asked him not to, and began immediately texting/calling multiple times a day, checking for my car in the parking lots at my apartment, and when he realized that he wasn’t getting the intended result, he began waking me up with phone calls early in the morning with loooong sob stories about past traumatic events that may or may not have actually occurred.
I feel awful but I am almost positive he’s lying to me; the way the stories are told are in very dramatic form…he pauses for effect and honestly, I don’t know what to tell him. These are things a professional (as in someone with a masters who wants to deal with this for a living and is equipped to do so) really should be sorting through, and not necessarily a means of guilting someone into dating.
Every time I saw him or talked to him, he always brought up his ex. Always, about three or four times when the topic came to sex, which is a huuuge problem and I told him. I just wanted him to either be able to not allow his past to cloud his current judgement (a perception problem) or to be able to not allow it to tarnish every potentially good conversation and feeling.
Again, something I can’t really do in my current state.
I feel terrible. He isn’t the first and he surely wasn’t the last since then. 2 weeks ago
What a difference it makes! I love not fooling with stupid people! 1 month ago
Long stories made short: I have this friend who wants to be exactly like me, while at the same time she wants to destroy me. It made our friendship awkward when she began to “change” into this new person over time and everyone began to take notice of it and it made them uncomfortable, as well. People are always better when they’re themselves.
Eventually, I chose the end the friendship like a subscription to a bad magazine because it was clear she was going to keep harassing me on various social media sites…in an attempt to get me to not be myself anymore.
I’ve tried to move on since then, but one of our old mutual friends messages me every so often just to make fun of how hard she’s trying now. He doesn’t really go into specifics often…but he usually just talks about how overboard she goes and how hateful and elitist she always sounds, because she’s still continuing her hateful diatribes that made her lose followers in the first place. I try to ignore this but it makes me sad because I feel partially responsible for her identity crisis.
I know he thinks she’s pathetic and all and he’s not trying to make me feel awful, but I do feel kind of guilty that I might have been the catalyst for this unnecessary change in her life. Even though she still strikes out at me from afar…the thing is, I’m really happy to have unfollowed her because she was a Negative Nancy and I do not wish to be reminded of how unhappy she (or anyone for that matter) still is. It’s kind of a buzzkill. We’ve both established that she’s crazy, but she also needs psychological help too if she’s still struggling with her identity after all this time.
This is the negative person I want to keep out of my life.
I also think she’s also kind of a great reminder for how terribly short life is. 3 months ago
How I did it: I just stood up to a girl that I thought was my friend, and she hates me now, but she made me realize that I don't need any negativity in my life. I told her everything that she said to me that made me angry, and like always, she just says that I need help with my anger. But, bye, not going to deal with her. I see her as a lesson learned. If someone I am friends with always make me angry and judged me on every single thing, leave them. I know I deserve better. Read how I did it… 4 months ago