enjoy life and find happiness

And that sounds like a cop-out, but really.

Trying to learn to recognize and celebrate. Daily.

Let’s see.

That I’m looking in the wrong place, sometimes.

The weather has been ridiculous. 73 today.

The warmness has lent some energy to my eye and I’m seeing pictures everywhere, and my unfrozen fingers can actually work the camera.

Everybody has days. That’s an assumption, to some extent, but it seems like a safe one.

I hoped that mine correlated to my weekly injection, usually the day after. There’s some documentation that supports that. But now, days later, not even looking at pictures of kitties seems to lighten the day. And, trust me, I tried.

Perhaps reading about this, or listening to too much Innocence Mission, or some combination of the two, hit too deep, or I’m just too available, emotionally, or some crap. But everything is heavy, this morning.

Everybody has days. Tomorrow will be a new one. I look forward to it.

I was thinking back to about a year ago this morning, before this last summer of darkness and tumult, and about the whole job thing.

Last year I was applying for jobs with about my current, larger salary, with high hopes of what might be possible with said income. But now, with said income, I’m really not any happier. No big surprise, but still, always nice to have ‘what everybody says’ (i.e. – no direct correlation between money and happiness) be proved true before your eyes.

So.

What to do to achieve a higher level of life enjoyment and happiness with the day job? And all the same, why do I flinch like a child at the thought of giving up the salary to spend more time doing something I might enjoy more?

Another from my Enjoy Life: Sunrise series….

For some reason, sunsets and sunrises have a good vibe for me, and witnessing them means that I’m participating in life, and maybe a little enjoying it, even.

The other morning, on the way to the train, this sky, unaltered here directly from my camera, made me exclaim out loud, “holy shit.”

I took the picture from the train platform, and yeah, that’s really a sunrise. I understand the current mild winter and the amazing colors are due to our human effect on the planet, but somehow it still reaches past that in my mind.

It might have something to do with how in all its blaze, by the time my train reached the subway, the colors had muted, faded and disappeared.

But I watched it from the train the whole way, catching the pinks and reds in brief glimpses between buildings, and wondered why it seemed I was the only one on the train who noticed.