stop being scared of using the phone

Hi all,

So glad that you’re all trying to work on the same thing as me – didn’t think anyone else would be!

I used to have Social Anxiety Disorder too until I got treated with NLP and hypnotherapy. However, this is one remainder from those scared days and I don’t even know why!

I have no issues talking to people face to face, but I don’t even like picking up the phone to friends and I hate making calls at work.

I think it might be 2 things – maybe knowing it is not as easy to say ‘no’ to things (thinking up excuses etc without being able to show body language). Also I sometimes think I’ll be disturbing people (even if I might be phoning for their own benefit).

Argh, I don’t get it but I need to work on it now as it is starting to effect my work. Would love to share what works with you guys. Good luck all – let’s get over this!

I managed to make a phone call the other day without having a panic attack.

It sounds pathetic to be so pleased about this but it’s taken me so long to get this far.

I suppose it’s just a case of getting used to it really. But I still would rather email. ;-)

I hate answering the phone at work in case someone asks me something I can’t deal with. It’s not a problem at home, and it’s got a lot better at work since I’ve become more familiar with my job, and I also have a handy list of other people I can transfer calls to if I find that what someone asks me is not something I know about. But I still panic momentarily when the phone goes, and have to hope someone else will answer it.

Making phone calls still terrifies me. I don’t know why, and that’s really what I’d like to get over by the end of this year. I applied for a supervisor’s job at my work recently and although I did pretty well in the interview they chose someone else because he has more confidence on the phone and in face-to-face situations. So basically, if I don’t sort this out soon I really am never going to get anywhere. Which is a depressing thought.

OMG, I’m so happy to see there are other people who share this phobia, aversion – whatever you want to call it. I have had this problem for as long as I can remember. In person I can’t shut up, but I avoid making calls all the time. I’ve even tried explaining to my relatives and old friends that I have this hang-up and they really don’t get it because I’m not exactly shy. My doctor told me she thinks it has something to do with being able to edit my thoughts (in letters and On-line) and in person you can read the other persons body language etc. also there isn’t the same pressure to continue the conversation constantly – you can have moments of silence and not feel awkward, but on the phone this is just weird, so you feel like you have to keep thinking of questions to ask, etc. I really wish I wasn’t so worried about all these little things – it can become exhausting. Also, my husband thinks I’m nuts and really doesn’t get it at all.

I’m not great at talking to people face to face but over the phone I’m a complete nervous wreck! I totally lose the ability to form a coherent sentence and either babble on about nothing or go completely silent. Then when I get off the phone I just feel like a total idiot.

I have to do something about it though because it’s seriously hampering my chances of getting a decent job.

Yeah, this makes me so anxious for some reason. I have no trouble speaking to someone face-to-face, or even calling someone if my job requires it, but to speak with someone I don’t know on the phone for the first time is really difficult. I have trouble ordering at drive-thrus, too. I think it might be less of a telephone specific thing, and more of a disembodied voice phobia.

i know exactly what you mean, i am a real scaredy cat when i have to call somebody and it really gets me down. Partly i think its down to feeling inadequate or something – i suffer from social anxiety disorder (sounds so drastic but in reality its very common) and i have real problems with being face to face with people or talking on the phone. Weird thing is everyone says im so outgoing but on the inside i feel like a child and really affects my confidence.

We should deffinately take little steps but it is difficult – most of the time i do ANYTHING just so i dont have to get on the phone!

I have to say though writing about it makes me feel a little better and to know that im not the only one!!

Cookie

I phoned Clive the allotment man today, he wasn’t in so I had to leave a message with his wife, which does mean i’m probably going to have to try and phone him again tomorrow, but at least I tried! I even gave myself a pat on the back afterwards for doing it. Little steps…

I get really scared of using the phone, at the moment I have about four phone calls to make and i’m doing this instead of making them, because really I will do anything to avoid using the phone.
I’m 33 and i’m sick of not feeling able to just pick up the phone and make the calls I need to do. I’m fed up of being scared to answer it if it rings.
But just writing this is making me feel sick so it may well be a while before I get this one done.