learn to take care of myself instead of others first

Just found this site. I really need to start doing this. Never been able to take care of ME first… I’ve always put others there.

I’m taking Flamenco dancing lessons, went on my second cruise, won grand prize in a beading contest, will be setting up a small booth next year to sell my jewelry (and will even try a tiny bit of online stuff), and being more selective about who my friends are.

I’m not done yet but I’m making progress!

I feel like I’m finally making progress on this goal. I called up work on Wednesday and spoke to my manager. I negotiated with her to get 1 weekend off work per month, starting in April. I’m going to need the time off because starting on Monday I have to do 40 hours of work experience per week for Uni.

Anyway, I’m also in the process of getting fit, I’m taking up a new hobby and I’ve just had a fantastic holiday in New Zealand. I think that was the turning point, I had such a great time there that I realised how rarely it is that I ever feel so happy. So it’s time for me to make a few changes in my everyday life, and find more of a balance somehow.

If you’re not working on your ideal day, you’re working on someone else’s.
- Marjorie Blanchard

I’ve realised lately, that I’m not very good at taking care of myself. I’m too dedicated to my job. I’m too loyal to people who don’t deserve my loyalty – people who will take advantage of my generosity. I work too many extra shifts when I know it will mean I’ll have to stay up all night doing uni work. Its really hit me recently just how unbalanced my life is. I work odd hours, I’m always going out of my way for other people, I’m permenently exhausted and I’m not eating well. I’m going insane and it all comes from putting other people ahead of myself. I need to step back and think about what I want for a change.

I have for so long tried to make everyone else happy and forgot that I need to make myself happy first and most importantly. I’ve adjusted my dreams and plans for other people and I know I’ve missed out on so much. I have to do the things that are best for me, excite me, and mean something to me; if others want to come along that’s fine. I have to go my way not others.

I seem to always worry about other peoples wants and needs and do everything I can to make sure they are happy. I put the things I want and care about on the back burner and fluff them off as being non important. I want to stop doing this and start taking care of myself and my happiness first.