Honestly tell people when something is bothering me, and then work it through with them.

Every time I do this I feel lighter. The weight of unsaid words lifts out of me and becomes something tangible that can be changed into something better. There’s a distinct change in me every time this happens. It’s suprising how much energy it takes to hold onto words, to keep them quiet.

Sometimes when my mom wants to reach me she’ll keep calling without leaving a message. This is annoying, especially since my call display isn’t working and I’ve no idea if the caller is a telemarketer. I’ve always skimmed over this with my mom because it’s easier for me to duck a confrontation than to face it. It finally felt okay for me to tell her, evenly, that I want her to just call once and leave a message, that calling me incessantly drives me away from the phone. She accepted this with a laugh.

One step closer to achieving this goal.

I’m working through a problem with a current client. Instead of quietly seething and then walking away, I’m trying to find a middle ground with him. It’s scary and nerve racking, and I feel good about it. I can feel myself growing from this experience. Not wanting to drop everything and walking away from this situation is a big change for me. We’re dancing with each other – I take a step, he takes a step, until we’re in sync with each other.