Forgive more

Forgive and forget is waht i really need to do. eh.

I tin to never forgive people…which leads to not trustin and being bitter, bc I dont forget things.

forgiveness is something that isn’t 100% for me, especially for the worst offenses (i.e. my house getting burned the day after christmas 3yrs ago by my hard-drug-addicted tenant). right now, i’m trying to get to at least 75% forgiveness for my 3 worst grudges. at least it would be a major improvement.

Feels good…always room for improvement…but I’m forgiving more now.

I am improving!

I am finally released from all that negativity and the hurt. It took me over 20 years to finally get free. It is worth whatever effort you must give to overcome unforgiveness.

Rhonda Britten says it something like this: Forgiveness comes down to a willingness to get over what I think should have happened and accept the reality of the present moment.

God says it something like this: If you think you don’t need to be forgiven, you are fooling yourself. You need forgiveness, too. Should you be forgiven if you are unwilling to forgive others?

Forgive and forget was the goal. Someone made me realize on here that forgetting isn’t a good idea. The past needs to be embraced as a positive thing. As far as the hurt that I felt from these experiences, I feel, “Oh, it is good to forget that hurt that you felt, so you are no longer in pain,” but even that pain should not be forgotten, maybe some, but not completely b/c, for instance, I could embrace the pain I felt and make it a positive thing. If I felt hurt or sad by a situation, that hurt or sadness can be remembered as, “See how much pain that experience gave you? Next time you won’t make yourself hurt by repeating that situation,” or “What they did hurt me so badly,” can be, “They hurt me, and now I am a stronger person. I forgive them for hurting me. I no longer hurt from this situation.” Forgetting your past is not necessary to make it less painful. It is helpful to embrace every part of you with love, and not forget chunks or your life. I am grateful I realize this.

Every book I read on personal growth talks about forgiving others. I understand this in my head and yet I just can’t seem to get there. I yearn for this one and it seems out of reach. What is forgiveness?

I’m stuck without it, apparently, and am wanting to want it. That’s a start.

its the forgetting part that gets me.

Im putting this as done but its really one of those ongoing projects that might well arise time after time in varying degrees.

Im accepting that forgiveness isn’t really a steady state of affairs; in that some days I might well be perfectly ok with something, as in feel no ill will or general bad vibe towards people who have contributed to messing up A B or C in my life whereas on other days I might just feel like not thinking too highly of them.

I thinks thats ok too, we aren’t machines, we shouldn’t be expected to behave in a binary way.

p.s Oh and the other thing too, is that sometimes its very easy to get all waah waah waah, and self absorbed and as a consequence, missing the fact that you might, just might have played a part in whatever grieveance you may have against another.My point being that recognising your role (if any) actually helps you move on and forgive.