be more lady-like

Well, I’m loud at times, Weak minded, I tend to be immature at times, Help! I want to speak with intelligence, I want my boyfriend to think that I’m such lady.

too loud
clumsy
rude
dirty
thoughtless
weak-minded

I want to have poise and presence, I want people to look at me with respect, I want to have opinions, I want to be “lovely”

I’m a tomboy, and having grown up with the same tight-knit, individualistic group of friends, had few inhibitions about my personality. But now I’m in junior year at a new school with none of my friends around me. My childish lack of social graces has been throwing people off. I used to think that it was playful and fun, but today my debate team member (and crush) decided to set things straight. He said that my cursing was unpleasant, that I was setting a bad example to my juniors by play-fighting and getting into verbal battles (it’s part of a inner drive to always be right…) and that I should to learn to control my temper. All of this is quite true. I’m a really nice person, but because I’m bluntly honest and wear my heart on my sleeve, some people feel offended.

My sense of social charms and graces are lacking. And so I’d love to be more ladylike, while keeping my short hair and interests (e.g. football), and be more presentable (mostly I can’t bother to waste so much time on my appearance).

Here are my goals for phase 1:
+ To be more pleasant and sophisticated when conversing with others (e.g. modulation of voice tone)
+ To be more articulate and use proper speech (the ‘dude’s, ‘duh’s and cursing have to go)
+ Be witty without being cruel
+ Invest more time in my appearance (i.e. brush my hair, keep my nails trimmed and free of chipped polish, stop slouching!!)

Hopefully I’ll improve within this month.

sigh...I know that’s what my problem is. Ha. “Problem”. I guess it’s not a problem that I’m just like my mother- but I know it’s a huge contributing factor in why this is so hard to nail down.
Now that I am no longer a hormonal teenager- I can see the forest for the trees: I am very multi-dimensional.
On one hand, I have manners. I’m always humble. I can get a good swagger going in a pair of heels and an LBD. I dress tastefully and my hair, skin, and nails are always nice if I step even a toe out the door.
I cook, I keep a clean house, and all of my husband’s friends are polite to me and respect me when they are over. They rinse out their glasses…hehe.
Being ladylike isn’t just wearing lacy, pretty things and crossing your legs when you sit. It’s about demanding respect and decency (in the nicest, most mannerful way, of course)- and getting it, too.
I have all of these qualities. But, my cursing has not become any better…grrr!!
And, there’s also the side to me that wants to play footie on the weekends with a team full of men, and slide tackle them into the dirt. There’s a part of me that wants to forsake heels, and tear up some mud in a jeep on 33’s.
I don’t know whether to give this goal up- or consider it done?
I feel I’ve learned my lessons about being feminine and what the virtues of femininity are. But, on the reverse- I’m still not Audrey effing Hepburn.
What do I do?!

I am a girly girl, not a tom boy…
But that the problem-i’m 20 but i still feel like a girl, i want to feel like a lady.
HELP PLEASE!!
My boyfriend is a 23 year old italian, and i think he thinks i’m too childish. and thy love there ladies.
Also i’m a beauty therapist, and my clients don’t take me seious because i look young also..
Any advice on acting more like a lady, but mostly looking like a lady would be amazing.
Thanks all
lucy-jane
x

hold back and be nice

I am really tired of feeling rude, crude, bossy, and brash. I desperatley wish to be more lady like. I want to improve my posture, poise, speech, etiquette, manners, and appearance. I was searching on google “how to be a lady” and I found a website that offers a program for this. It is supposed to help you achieve everything I stated above. Has anyone heard of the program UdefineU? It’s at www.UdefineU.com I am really interested in ordering it, but I really do not want to waste my money if it is just junk. Check it out and let me know what you think. I am always so skeptical of buying programs online. Thanks!

I’m starting to think I may never be “lady like”.
My friends say, that despite my incessant cursing, I’m always very feminine.
But, I feel that having the desire to hop on a motorcycle and cross the African continent isn’t exactly feminine.
Perhaps I’m not cut out to be a girly girl.
I don’t want to give up this goal, though.
I could curb my cursing… :D

I think I like my tomboy nature so I’m not going to attempt to break it, I doubt I could even if I wanted to. My friends think I’m funny and I like to swear when I’m talking to them because it can really liven up the conversation. I like not worrying about my feet getting tired when I go walking. I like not worrying about shaving my legs because I can wear jeans on those days and nobody’ll be the wiser. Sometimes I like it when I get help with things but I also like to do things by myself.

Plus, I’m just not sure about that whole “guys respect you more” when you’re ladylike. I know that all of my guy friends respect me heaps because I know more about basketball than pretty much all of them.

but it’s hard not to swear when you’re in a fantasy basketball league with your best friends. every other word is a cuss word. maybe i’ll resign myself to being a lady in real life and the brash tomboy online/with my close male friends.

i suppose i ought to get heels and quit wearing flip flops and my topsiders everywhere. maybe i should resign my celtics/red sox shirts to the gym. i should also keep my mouth shut about things i don’t know anything about unless i’m making an effort to learn about them, otherwise i just sound like a fool! that has nothing to do with being a lady, though. it’s just part of my tomboyish nature that i need to break.