speak the truth more often

as done!

It’s become 2nd nature now to just say things that I’m feeling&thinking instead of hiding behind a web of verbal distraction. I had become really good at being sort of invisible. Also, the new friendships I’ve made are with honest people, people who are insightful and cut through the b.s., so that helps too! :)

When you tell the truth respectfully, it becomes easier & easier. Then life goes much more smoothly b/c people know where you stand so you don’t find yourself squirming out of uncomfortable situations – you actually avoid uncomfortable situations altogether. I used to just keep my mouth shut before. I had been operating under the mistaken belief that the less people know about my real thoughts, the better off I’d be. It’s completely wrong. That way of thinking only got me into situations that I didn’t want to be in. I was avoiding the truth. Now I can say exactly what I feel and it’s so liberating.

My friends & family know me better now; my boss and co-workers know where I stand on work situations and they know why; I have very few ‘enemies’ b/c people know I’ll tell them that I’m upset and I’ll try to work out the best solution if there’s a conflict, so in that way, I’m still respecting people who may disagree with me or my ideas. I don’t take disagreements personally, but I always try to work things out. If it’s best to leave it alone, I can do that too. This brings a lot of freedom and I’m not as tense trying to hold everything in all the time!

Let me also clarify that telling the truth doesn’t mean I’m being aggressive toward other people. Everyone’s got their truth too, so I’m respectful of that and listen to everyone’s opinions.

So, I can almost mark this goal as done. I still feel that I have to become stronger at this, so I’ll keep practicing the fine art of truth-telling.

Now, the real truth will come out & this includes some resentments. Here is where honesty will challenge my habit of keeping my mouth shut. How to balance the desire to be open with the desire not to hurt another person?

Maybe resentment just means that I haven’t been telling the truth all along?

ok, speaking truthfully is starting to be something that I do regulary now. It’s so liberating & bringing me a lot of peace. Also, it’s making all of my relationships a lot better because I feel closer to people. I have fewer regrets, and a lot less mental energy spent on wishing that I had said something that I hadn’t said.

is it worth it? yeah, totally.

have I lost any friends because I’m being more honest? no. I’ve actually strengthened my relationships. Only one relationship has ended, but it would have anyway and I feel peaceful knowing that I’ve said everything that I’ve had to say. what a relief~

I’ve got to keep doing this.

I’m not always very honest! I’ll tell people what they want to hear, or change the subject very adeptly to avoid talking about how I really feel. Soooo, I’m changing this! But it’s very tough b/c I do it so naturally now that telling the truth is weird for me. But I’m going to do it! Instead of brushing past a tough topic, I’m going to dive in & be truthful. then I can’t say that my friends don’t understand me b/c they will have to hear what I mean. And I won’t feel like I’m hiding myself anymore.

Whoa, this will be tough. I’ll try it this week. Of course, i’m afraid of having disagreements with people, but I would respect someone telling me the truth, so I will have to just let things happen. If we do disagree, at least I’m not selling myself out. Once the truth is out there, you have a solid place to work from. Whereas if one person (like me!) is dishonest, the relationship is already out of balance. Right?

Nine months and one whole day ago is really the last time i told the truth about my life to my parents. 11 Months ago was the first time i smoked weed. yesterday was the last time. My mother really doesn’t understand how fucked up in the head i am. I’ve lied about everything. Where my pain pills go..where my bi-polar pills go. everything. What i do when i’m not home. What i say to someone when their not around. I had just turned 18 on May the 19th 2005. since then my life really has went down the drain. tried college. dropped out. done drugs…only way to stop it all. I seriously want to stop telling lies. But how. My life will get worse. IF it really hasn’t hit rock bottom.

i find it hard when you have those times when you have got to lie but you think it would be so much better if you told the truth i get those situations like all the time

I want to be brave enough to speak the truth in my heart. (Yikes!)