dispel the myth of what an engagement ring SHOULD look like

I’m disappointed that my friend, who got married in December, has decided her non-diamond ring set isn’t good enough.

She said she picked them out thinking only about price said she felt like she’s “wearing her financial woes” around on her finger. And that she deserves better than that.

I can’t help thinking she could benefit more from an attitude adjustment than from a $1200 piece of jewelry (especially since they are saving towards a house and her second child is on the way)(and especially since once you purchase it, a ring holds only a fraction of it’s original “value”).

I have no idea what to tell her, though. My skepticism doesn’t seem to be having the desired effect.

to see people adopting this goal! Rock on!

I was sitting on the subway staring at the woman across from me and her ring, thinking about how boring it is for every individual relationship to be expressed by the exact same thing: a circle of metal and a plain (if sparkly) stone.

Maybe I’m just being contrarian, but I don’t want to try to make my love fit into this box.

It is all about profit. I appreciate the posts on this, I thought I was the only one that felt this way.

Diamond engagement rings haven’t been around forever, aren’t appropriate to every financial situation, and don’t appeal to everyone. I really don’t like feeling like I’m being groomed to become just another consumer for this commodity, and I don’t think I’m comfortable supporting the diamond industry’s questionable practices. Plus, all the marketing is just so pathetic.

Vintage rings can be really nice.

a friend just got engaged with a vintage ring! can’t wait to see it.

Lately I’ve gotten some flack and funny looks about the origins and size of my engagement ring.

My guy and I talked about what the ring would look like and where to get it from for weeks, making sure it fit with our environmental and fiscal ideals. I’m also just not that materialistic and have a weird Buddhist relationship with possessions anyway. So we got my ring, a tiny flower of ruby and diamonds, from a pawn shop for $150. After the proposal we found him a “mangagement” ring (stainless steel and cz from btiff.com) that was about the same price as mine.

Anyway, I wish people would explore antique and vintage rings. They are so much more beautiful than what is currently being made, without the guilt of blood diamonds/gems and environmentally toxic gold-mining practices.

“But how do you know what you’re worth to him?” I’ve gotten asked… If our relationship needs an expensive trinket to prove my worth to him, then we’re in trouble. This man has literally crossed the globe several times to be at my side and that’s sign enough for me.