have great sex

Am I the only woman in the entire world who has not once been aroused while having sex??

i want to have great sex with one partner and only one partner. i want to be open to anything and everything. sex toys, communication, and positioning. i want to unleash my inner goddess…

I want to have insane orgasms and scream at the top of my lungs haha.

more often than not. but i’m wondering whether sleeping with my ex husband is altogether conducive to finding a lovely new partner, who i can have great sex with AND fall in completely love with.

and i’m thinking that it probably isnt.

its the cut and pasted e-mail conclusion to a conversation, interrupted, that i was having with a sweet, far away friend who i seem to say things to that i wouldn’t necessarily say to anyone else.

he’s 20 years old (to my 32) and i hope, for the sake of the many more women he’s bound to have sex with in his lifetime, that he does go and look at the website i’m talking about-

http://www.the-clitoris.com/

i think women should go and look too, if you’re interested. so here you go.

Ok so this website I was looking at…. is basically an educational website, about women, their bodies, their relationship with their bodies, and sex.

I say educational but it’s pretty explicit in this very down to earth way.

So if you go and look at it, be prepared to come across close ups of women’s vaginas, piercings, menstrual blood, breasts.

But it’s not done to titillate -they’re real women, not porn stars, and it’s refreshing to see real body parts in all their squonky, sometimes hairy, asymmetrical, definitely not plastic glory.

But the pictures I wasn’t interested in so much- well I was interested actually ( in a kind of detached scientific way (yes, really!)) but it was the letters that women had sent in that I just could not stop reading.

Want an insight into what women think about sex? Go and look. Because it’s so damn honest and real.

These women admit to some things that are totally unacceptable in normal society, or things that are just never spoken about; god I love them for it… and looked at in that light it all becomes acceptable and normal- I can’t say I was totally horrified by anything, but some of it was a little sad.

And some of it I really related to.

From people’s entries on this site- it seems like most women who would describe themselves as heterosexual think a lot about other women, everyone f** themselves into oblivion regularly, and in comparison I am definitely not obsessed with sex!

So, it’s not like I had hang-ups or anything- I just find it fascinating and it’s kind of good to know what other women are thinking and feeling and doing. I’ve never really spoken in any kind of detail to friends about my experiences. Hence being so curious, and attempting to grill you on certain things- (that was only the tip of the iceberg)

I wish people generally would be a bit more open; the only way people seem to be able to cope with sex in society is to plasticise it or make a joke out of it. It doesn’t come close to expressing the power and oblivion and release and relinquishment and everythingness and nothingness that comes with an orgasm. And the way people who appear completely in control are regularly losing control completely and utterly, because you can’t help but let it happen.

This is what I’ve always been so amazed by, but I kind of wondered whether most people don’t experience it like that. How could they and keep so quiet about it? All that makes it into the media is the silicone tits and the sniggering behind one’s hand. But people do feel it and get it and it makes me unreasonably happy to think that maybe the reason no one talks about it is because it’s huge and sacred and awe inspiring.

Or maybe it scares them, or maybe they feel bad to feel so good? I don’t know. But it is fascinating to me.

I sort of feel like you might be shocked if you go and check it out (maybe that’s the mother in me… you’re probably not that easily shocked- it’s just that it’s so intimate!), but I think in the interests of your own education b you should. Maybe it’s only the madly horny women that write into that site, but I really don’t think so. And there’s a lot of really good information there too, aside from the letters. You might think you know it all already, but you don’t. And neither did I.

Dear friend-of-a-friend three-night stand:

THANK YOU FOR EXISTING.

(free) love,
Christina

but still my ex husband

i’m not putting this on my done list til i’ve found someone to have great sex with who ISN’T my ex husband.

i don’t want to put any pressure on him, or the relationship, but i’m pretty positive that sex with him is going to be great. i care about him a zillion times more than all my other partners combined. that has to equal great sex, right?

I want great sex. Satisfying. Earth-shattering. Heart-thumping. And I want it every single day. Is that too much to ask??