be a good girlfriend

The day before I left for Japan, a friend and I are talking and he admits he’d like to pursue a relationship with me. I’d known him for my entire senior year, I thought he was cool but I’d never thought of him that way, and since I was leaving the country, made no promises. When I returned he paid a 70 taxi fee for me to come stay with him for a few days. We seemed to hit it off somehow. Two months later, he’s helplessly in love with me. Maybe part of me knows he’s not “the one”, if there is such a thing, because I can feel myself pushing him away. I’ll start fights, critisize him, and even say things that if said to me, would sting. It doesn’t matter what I do though, he thinks I’m the one and will not have me pushing.

My goal is to try and be a better girlfriend. He’s done nothing for me to be so harsh, I don’t know why I can be so mean. I don’t want this to always be a problem, in every relationship.

There has been alot of arguing lately, and I feel like it’s my fault. I pick alot of our fights and mostly over nonsense. Like its stuff that shouldnt bother me like it does. I know that he loves me, I should be secure in that. He does the best that he can, always trying to please me although it really is impossible sometime. I need to let go of this need to fight with him. I need to relax and stop being so uptight with him.If something bad happens then I will deal with it when it happens. I spend so much time trying to prevent him messing up that I push him right to the very thing that I don’t want. I done trying to control everything.(Much easier said than done but I am really going to try)

I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now. We’ve been through a lot recently, but I feel the experience taught me a lot. I learned that I have quite a bit of growing to do. I expect a lot from him and need to hold myself just as accountable. Im learning to focus more on his needs rather than my own. I am also working on being more understanding and far slower to anger.

i want good friend…........

hi,all….........

i am rabin….......

how ru all friends?................

I’m with somebody new now, which makes reading this old entry rather strange to remember! Anyways, I really feel like I have fulfilled this goal, it took me awhile to see that being a good girlfriend means more than being loyal.

WHAT IS THE DEAL?
It seems whenever I am attracted to a guy he is never attracted back! This is getting ridic, at least this one doesn’t hate vegetarians or the fact that I hate football, he hates it too! But he was supposed to text and pick me up, but he didn’t text, I embarrassed myself immensly and then he says he can’t take me out? Ridic, so I’m being forward, I told him i thought he was awesome but if he wasn’t interested to just tell me..
I’m waiting for the reply so I can down some more sleeping pills and be rid of all this nonsense.
I mean what is the deal? Is it he’s too young? I did everything right, i got his number, waiting a few days, we texted a good bit, didn’t bother him the next day, he texted me about the movies, we had a good time, he didn’t text for a day, when he did he said i was gorgeous then i asked him to text me to go out tonight, but he didn’t, i embarrassed myself now he’s replying saying he just got out of a relationship and he isn’t ready for another.
Fuck that shit.

Either this kid isn’t interested or is playing it smooth as hell, cause he’s got me on the brink something serious.
At my school I would see this ADORABLE guy who I smiled at nearly everytime I saw him, and he smiled back when he didn’t look exhausted.
So I found out his name and one day when walking in the same direction asked for his number which he instantly gave me!
So I waited a respectable two days and sent a text his way, we ended up texting for five hours!
The conversation ended with me telling him to text about the movie Sunday (this was a Friday) and he complied.
So Saturday I get nothing at all, so I figure when Sunday rolls around I’m just gonna be let down because I don’t hear from him.. until later that afternoon!
We set up movie plans for that night and then meet up, I was early and purchased my own ticket (looking hot as hell I might add) and upon sitting he puts the armrest down, turn off!
He also made no comment on my appearance.
Throughout the movie we laugh at eachothers witty remarks and he seems to find me entirely TOO funny :] we didn’t hold hands but towards the end he leaned his arms all on my shoulder.
We had a fun time and by the time I get home he’s texting again!
The next day we smile and say a quick hey in the halls but I got no text all day or even now. I had to distract myself all afternoon because of it.
he of course has no idea how frantic I am right now, he’s probably just going about his normal day oblivious, which is good. It means I’m playing the right way, making him come to me, but..
Smooth or not interested?

That’s because it’s an ongoing process to become a better girlfriend or boyfriend or husband or wife or whatever. You don’t just wake up one day and say, “Well, I’m better at this now, so I can cross it off my list.” No. I’m going to have to continually work on this for the rest of my life.

Z and I have been together 3 years next week, and I do have to say that I have become a better girlfriend since we started out. I’m older and more mature, and we both have a lot more experience in a relationship now than we did then.

But, like I said, I’m not going to complete this one in my lifetime. I just want to keep track of the moments when I succeed and fail.

Things didn’t work out with the new guy.. he seemed to be losing interest, then I was told by a mutual friend he doesn’t want to commit, plus he would want a Christian, meat-eating girl who wants to talk about football.
Who knew?