save my marriage

My husband quit drinking at the beginning of the summer and has stuck with it. He realized that I was leaving if he didn’t do something drastic. My concern now is that he seems depressed. He doesn’t want to go to AA meetings anymore (his excuse is that they preach too much about god). I can’t make him go, even though I wish he would. All I can do is focus on myself.

Things had been going so well between my husband and I. We went out over the weekend and had a blast together. He was the man I married all weekend. Well, it’s Monday and all of that has changed. I came home from work today to find him gone. Him and most of my house. He took our bed, the washer and dryer, all of my jewelry, the tv’s and so much more…That was all after I had spoken to him twice today and things were fine. He tells me he loves me but that he needs some time to think, and honestly I don’t know if I can give him that time. I feel like we keep going round and round doing the same things over and over. Things are fine, then his brother gets a bug up his butt, then things are bad. He wants me to still see our marriage counselor with him Friday, I just don’t know. I love him with all of my heart and would do most anything for him, but can I really keep letting him hurt me like this?

I saw Tina and the kids today. I was on my best behavior while we loaded boxes. Didn’t get more than 10 mins with Tina but I got most of the day with the kids. I did get to make them lunch. KD for the kids (requested Daddy’s way) and then my wife and I sat and ate. I could tell she was uncomfortable like this BUT enjoyed it. We continued packing and as the evening there was talk of them staying so we could do more packing. They decided to go home and come back Friday. I was comfortable with that but confused at the same time. I asked her about it and she said she hadn’t planned for it so she was not ready. I understand that. Then they left. My sunshine left and it was dark. The nightmare has returned.

I have just become separated … not just from my wife but from the kids too. I have never had an epic fail at something so important in all my life.

I feel like I’m caught in a cyclone. My husband and I have been through some very difficult situations during our short marriage, deaths of family members, a miscarriage, financial problems, problems with family members, etc. Last night he tells me he loves me but he doesn’t know if he loves our marriage. His brother won’t stay out of our lives and keeps putting more and more bull into his head, and unfortunately his brother has been about his only male role model throughout his life (his dad was very sick most of the time he was growing up). His brother is one of those people that if he’s happy he doesn’t care if anyone else is, he was actually the cause of a brief separation between my husband and I. I’m so in love with my husband and can’t imagine ever wanting to be with anyone else. I just don’t know how to get my husband to listen to his own heart instead of listening to his brother. I really need help…

I still feel the same as I did 5 months ago. I don’t know if I still want to put up with this anymore. I’m not happy and I don’t know if I’ll ever reach that level of happiness again. :(

My wife and I have decided to separate…we both agree that we both have issues that we need to work on before we try to come back together. I have never felt this much pain in my life…but I know this is something that I have to do to save our marriage.

I want to call and hear her voice every day…but I know I shouldn’t and give her space.

I have no idea what to do!!!

I decided to let go of what I thought marriage was to be and embrace my own. I am not abused, I am loved and sometimes misunderstood. When or if its ever time to abandon my vows… I will consider it seriously and only within good reason.

This is not going well…apparently it takes two people to do this.

We went for breakfast alone together yesterday. It was very nice and relaxing. I would like to do this more often. When we spend more time alone we seem to get along better. Hmmm imagine that.