After redecoration, my house is really messy. It kinda overhelms me. 11 months ago
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Established last night that I tidy better in the evening when my pumpkin is home. Due to this I have come up with a new plan, shall dedicate the day to resting and crafty things and shall spend the evening while my pumpkin watches his sports tidying the house. Hopefully this will stop me feeling so bad during the day when I really dont feel like tidying and will still get the house tidy. 17 months ago
I know that it is nurture rather then nature but I am definately untidy because of my parents and so I am going to blame it on genetics. Growing up with my mum and dad I learned two lessons…..one in hoarding everything and one in that if there is an activity that you would rather be doing then the tidying can be left until later. I have taken these lessons to heart and I dont think I cant honestly say that I have ever had a tidy room and now house for more then maybe a week. It is a terrible burden always feeling embarassed that everything is so untidy and I hate having visitors for that reason because I am always having to apologise. At this point I would like to point out that it is untidy and not dirty (I cant stand dirty houses). Anyways I save everything….oh look at that scrap of paper that I wrote a wee note on ten years ago that was such a funny day I should probably keep that, oh look theres that feather I found that one time way back when will keep that…..Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! It is nice to have the memories I guess but when it gets to the stage that having a messy house stops you from making new memories it is probably time to throw those things out and move on. Something which I think I am slowly getting good at and have cut down my masses of junk very drastically recently by getting rid of the majority of the contents of my childhood room and moving the rest into mine and my boyfriends wee house. It looks like a very wee house now :-). The other and probably bigger problem is that of the other life lesson my parents taught me. Dont tidy when you dont feel like it because you will just be ineffective wait until you are in the mood. Only problem is that I suffer from severe depression and am very rarely in the mood to do anything but hide on the couch with a blanket over my head. Most days just the thought of tidying makes me panic or makes me very very tired and I end up having to go to sleep for hours. So my house is constantly a mess which sucks for me and for my boyfriend. Worse still he supports me financially while I battle my illness so I feel like I should be keeping the house clean while he is at work (my view not his, hes very understanding always) and probably only make it more untidy as I try find ways to destract myself. So I thought that tracking my progress on here might help and encourage me and I’m hoping that by christmas I will have worked out a strategy for a tidy home and can start the new year with guests in a home I can be proud of. Fingers crossed 17 months ago