scary stuff
16 months ago
Creating genuine intimacy is about being completely honest. Scary stuff. But obviously we can’t truly know each other, love each other, if we’re not completely honest. And that includes the deep feelings that almost always triggers my fight-or-flight reflex.
I’ve known him so long, we’ve been through so much together, we’re so solid – just as able to spend every second together as months apart – and still it scares me so to completely open up.
Somehow, somewhere, I feel like my soul, my heart, the real, true me is so different, so complicated, so weird it would scare the ** out of him. Except I know it wouldn’t, because he knows more about me than anyone, more than I myself do at times. It’s like he can read my mind, or my soul even. He knows, and he’s still around. So why am I soo scared?
Aug 03, 2008, 02:39PM PDT | 2 cheers | 0 comments
We’ve bought nice food, good wine, loads of dessert, some films.
Tomorrow is going to be all about us, celebrating what we have.
I’m really looking forward to it. And I can’t wait to see if he likes his card :)
Feb 13, 2008, 08:57AM PST | 1 cheer | 0 comments
I feel we have talked so much more the last few weeks. Not just been sitting talking while curled up together by the TV but actually TALKED, discussed, thought about things together…explored. I’ve found out new things about him, he’s found out new things about me. It’s great. It’s much too easy to think that after four years together you know everything about eachother.
Jan 22, 2008, 07:11AM PST | 1 cheer | 0 comments
What I am already doing:
- Showing my love for him in how I treat him and touch him
- Spending a lot of time with him
- Giving him compliments
- Making sure he knows how much I appriciate him, who he is and all he does for me
- Being there for him in every way I can
What I need to do:
- Get us to talk more – about deeper, more meaningful things
- Get us to plan the future – at least the near future – more often and better
- Be more honest and open about what I feel and want
- Show him my love with words too
Dec 09, 2007, 02:15PM PST | 2 cheers | 0 comments
love courageously as someone on here phrased it. How the heck do i step from here to there?!!
I’m in a love drought and have been for my whole life. I’m so scared to take the plunge and let myself be loved and my heart feels frozen—I don’t know if I can love. Of course, common sense says I can. It’s a big jump. I guess it’s within my power to open the floodgates to my heart. eeek!! That’s Superduper scary for me. I might get hurt or combust with all the feeling.
I wanna get married barefoot outside on a beach. That scares me. Actually, i am reclutant to say I want to get married. What if it doesn’t come true? How can I think of having kids too? Do I deserve them? How will I take care of them. I have many fears. I’m only writing about it now because it’s on my mind.
The thought of loving and being loved is more nebulous. I can handle it more. No committment. Freedom.
Just getting it out, trying to be real.
- working on improving my body
- meditating to get at the root of my fears
- calling on the angels to bring love to me
- practise speaking my truth
- setting boundaries from the beginning
- have fun and be ok exactly as I am.
Crazy wonderful love would be wonderful and I am going to experience that.
Mar 16, 2007, 04:46PM PDT | 4 cheers | 0 comments