Regularly Question The Universe, And See What It Really Has To Say For Itself

I’ve covered a lot of ground in my Faith Inquisition. I started on one end of the spectrum and have steadily progressed to the other. I still have more questions than answers, but I feel more confident than ever that I’m being truthful with myself. As I once read on a sign posted on the door of a grad student office at N.C. State, “I feel that I’m confused on a higher level, and about more important things.”

Why am I here? What am I supposed to be doing? What if the things I have worked for don’t make me happy? Who will love me? Who will I love?

This is why it is easier for me to take care of other people than to invest in taking care of myself… then I do not have to question these things. That would feel almost selfish.

But – what happens when caring about others actually pushes them away?

I move away from my previous religious beliefs for a bit and then I move back towards them after a while. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with learning and respecting and even adopting other belief systems when they speak to you, and so that’s what I’ve been doing lately. I’ve developed a pretty syncretic belief system by now. Some odd combination of Christianity, Taoism, Buddhism, and good sound science. When I used to hear of people who were “designing their own religion,” I always thought, how confusing for them. They never know if they’re “right” or not because they don’t have anyone to look to who is an “authority.” I only recently discovered that there is no authority on my faith and my values – except me. And the more I read and talk to people from all different traditions, the better I feel about my own system. It’s starting to come together.

a truly intelligent life is one in which one never loses the eager curiousity and love the truth a child has…

That’s all I ask.