be an unapologetic atheist

Religion is a threat to reason. Reason is the most empowering tool to master, the foundation of an educated polity is reason. Empowering people to live healthy, happy, autonomous lives is what gets me out of bed in the morning. It is my civic responsibility to be an atheist, and it’s yours, too.

I, like most Brits, am far more apologetic about Islam than about Christianity. This article made me feel uncomfortable even though I know that rationally, it makes sense and that had the journalist been talking about Christianity, I would have felt no such unease.
The biggest challenge for me is to be consistent with my atheism, and not shirk away from criticising Islam where I would have no such qualms concerning Christianity.

The music teacher just asked me to listen to a CD of gospel songs and write out the lyrics. I did so without qualm, but then he asked me to translate them and we ended up having a huge conversation about the Christian church in Japan and the missionaries who roam the streets here.
Turns out he (and all the other teachers who happened to be listening) finds them just as offensively patronising as any unapologetic atheist does.

“Japan has had its own religions for hundreds of years, so who on earth do they think they are to turn up and tell us all we’re going to hell just because their religion was invented thousands of miles away where we were unlikely to hear of it!”

“We go about living our lives, and they go about living theirs, and leading a good life should be all there is to it. I don’t understand how they could think that leading a good life in the name of their god is better than leading it by following the teachings of Buddha, or just from a general respect for the world and things in it.”

And, my personal favourite…
“If their god does exist, shouldn’t he be able to come up with a better way of revealing himself to us than sending these idiots on their bicyles to accost us as we try to do our shopping?”

silly religious arguments

friend: shit, it’s cold today!

me: yes, minus 25! Beautiful clear sky though. Did you see the sunrise?

friend: no, I overslept.

friend’s friend: that’s why Dawkins is wrong.

me and friend: er…sorry?

friend’s friend: if evolution was [sic] true, then no one would have been able to live in these temperatures.

me and friend: er…sorry?

friend’s friend: because evolution happened a long time ago, and obviously monkeys wouldn’t have had clothes or central-heating, so how could they have survived long enough to turn into humans?

friend: er, evolution doesn’t actually say that monkeys turned into humans.

friend’s friend: yes, it does.

friend: no, it doesn’t. A common ancestor is not the same thing as one thing “turning into” another.

friend’s friend: ......... isn’t it? Oh. But what about all the art that wouldn’t have been made without religion?

friend: er…. but you’re not saying that actually increases the likelihood of Christianity actually being true, are you?

friend’s friend: [thinks hard for a while] no. But religion isn’t necessarily about truth.

friend: do you think maybe that is part of the problem?

friend’s friend: there’s no need to be so aggressive. I have a right to defend my beliefs!

friend: and you believe that religion creates art and that is a reason for endorsing it?

friend’s friend: yes.

me: Wilfred Owen’s poems are art. That isn’t a reason to endorse war.

friend’s friend: yes, it is.

friend: .......... more tea, anyone?

If one or two people tell you that you’re an ass, you can ignore them. But if three or four people tell you you’re an ass, you might think about putting on a saddle.”
- Yiddish saying

Apparently, atheism is a religion in itself. What do you reckon?

Man in bookshop: do you know if they stock Reader’s Digest here?

Me: [flicking through Japanese print advertising, 1930-1955] erm…maybe. Have you tried the foreign magazine section?

Man in bookshop: Oh, good idea, I’ll do that. Do you live here?

Me: erm, [Is he a stalker? Is he a stalker?] ..... nearby. Not actually in the bookshop, obviously.

Man in bookshop: HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Me [Oh my god he is a stalker! That wasn’t funny, why is he laughing like that?]

Man in bookshop: Say, can I have your number?
Me: [looks at him witheringly] I’m an atheist.

Man in bookshop: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Awkward pause.

Man in bookshop walks away.

and a woman, people often ask me:
“How tall are you?”

Recently I have started responding, to the English speakers at least,
“How tall was Jesus?”, and then nodding sagely.

Hilarious.  Highly recommended.

I imagine this would work in most other cases of irritating questioning, too.

“How much do you weigh?”
“How much did Jesus weigh?”

“How old are you?”
“How old was Jesus?”

“What shoe size are you?”
“What shoe size was Jesus?”

Unless you’re in a shoe shop at the time, in which case such a response is likely to lead to awkward pauses amongst the sales staff

“Do you mind if I smoke?”
“Does Jesus mind if you smoke?”

“Do you come here often?”
“Does Jesus come here often?”

“Can I come in?”
“Can Jesus come in?”

“Do you floss?”
“Did Jesus floss?”

“What’s your inner thigh measurement?”
“What was Jesus’ inner thigh measurement?”

“Who will you vote for?”
“Who would Jesus vote for?”

and so on and so forth.

Here in Austin, we now have two thriving atheist groups. We do cable access TV and internet shows, and we get together for lectures, and support political protests.

People are uneasy around atheists largely because they do not talk to them. You often hear casual slander of godless people; well-meaning theists blame a lot of society’s problems on us. I’d say don’t be a jerk about it, there’s no need to bring it up at every possible opportunity. But if somebody says something that ought to be answered, then answer it. It’s hard at first, but in the long run you’ll be glad you did.

Japanese seller of dairy produce: Would you like a yoghurt?
Me: I’m an atheist.
Japanese seller of dairy produce: Really? That’s nice. Would you like a yoghurt?

I think the Japanese have a very healthy attitide towards religion. That is, they don’t understand what all the fuss is about. There are religions of sorts, of course, but Japanese Buddhism is more a code of living rather than an actual religion, and Shintoism is just ceremonial traditions coupled with an ancient respect for nature. Nobody actually believes that there is literally a god in every tree. I dated a shinto priest for a while, and even he didn’t believe it. Moreover, the fact that these different “religions” have co-existed for so long here – most people have shinto marriages and buddhist funerals – means the concept of a jealous monotheistic religion is all a little bewildering for them. Nobody gives atheism a second thought. They just want to sell you yoghurt. It’s only the over zealous foreigners you have to watch out for (see atheism in action parts one and two).
Which is nice.