be a better big sister

I’m taking my little sister out tomorrow for a walk and a cup of tea… some one to one time.

She’s talking to me again. She started laughing at something I said to someone else and then called me a moose and poked me.

All is well again. Haha.

Well I bought them a load of stuff… but you can’t buy love… unless of course it’s silence. It appears silence or the appearance of it can buy peace.

My siblings are now teenagers. My sister was home alone with boys in the house recently and because I found out about it I found myself on the other end of a teen strop. I haven’t told our parents- if they found out she’d be grounded for life. I guess she thinks I’m going to tell them… unlikely. I phoned my parents because I’d lost my keys and wanted to pop home but they weren’t in- she was. She now keeps swearing at me and wont even look me in the eye. She also told Ben to tell me I’m a lot of really nasty things. I’m sure he appreciated it. I was walking past on the street and got a two finger salute to which I responded ‘grow up’ and she then sent me an email saying ‘I hate you and I’m not talking to you anymore.’ She ended it in more swear words. I forgot how hostile teenagers could be. She’s only just getting to that stage but it’s already driving me nuts. I have no idea how to be a ‘better’ sister to that? I’ve ignored her and not risen to her. I’ve tried emailing her back with ‘that’s fine’ but she then sent another torrent of abuse. It’s almost impossible to be a grown up when faced with a teenager. It’s scary. Thank goodness I don’t have kids of my own.

...are my favourite people in the whole entire world!!! I need to remind them of this because lately I’ve been sooooooo wrapped up in my own little world that they’ve sort of been sidelined.

I definitely need to be about more!!!! And give them more of my time.

Even as I wrote the title of this post I was yelling at the kids. Sometimes the issue is distance, which I need to solve by getting up off my butt to talk to them. If the problem isn’t worth me getting up over, I shouldn’t really be arguing with them about it.
The other issue is my own anger and/or stress, both of which I need to learn to get a handle on in general, but I tend to take them out on my little siblings.

I try my very hardest. I’ve become my siblings parent because their real parents are always busy working 12 hour shifts. I don’t care really, being a mother to them, but it’s just I never feel Like I do good enough. Give them morals, values, tell them whats right from wrong but letting them learn.

We went to the library today and I was asked if we could get THREE books instead of just one “PLLLEEEEEAAAASE?” As if I would say no. Then Happy Meals (healthy choices) and off to feed the ducks (geese?) at the park. Good day.

today i did flash cards with the little bro, along with that i played memory with him, danced like a goofball with him while we were watching lazy town, and built a uneven roofless shapeless house thing out of lincon logs. it was fun

i want to show them things
they are todlers
i want to do arts and crafts with them
and projects that they will actually sit through
and things that they will learn from

My sister rang me last night and told me that I could tick this one off as done! I didn’t even know that she had seen my 43T list, I was really touched :-)