discover new sources of cheap entertainment

All needed is a entertaining mind and keen eyes.

I like the free online ones because they are so entertaining. Taking a personality test is sort of like going to a psychic. You think this person/test knows all of these special things about you but they don’t. All of the “special knowledge” they have is based upon what you tell them or what they observe about you. Anyway, with that being said, I took a personality test the other day on www.personalitytest.net. I think it was a Jung one. According to them I’m a ISTJ, but I think I’m more of a INTJ with a creative mind. How accurate can a test be if the results are based upon:

1.) self reporting
2.) no hard, scientific data (like how many times did you get angry yesterday, how often do you smile and for how long, etc.)
3.) what kind of mood you’re in when you take the test
4.) what phase of your life you’re in when you take the test (maybe I would’ve had another personality type when I was in college)

Conclusion:

personality test = modern day version of crystal ball

Results:

very funny

“It reads like a mystery, a novel. It’s well written.”
- Dubya’s assessment of the 9/11 Commission’s report
Crawford, Texas, July 26, 2004

“Freedom frightens people who are terrorists.”
- Hershey, PA, April 19, 2004

And one of the best quotes ever…...

“Wow, Brazil is big.”
- Dubya’s reaction upon being shown a map of Brazil by the President of Brazil
Brasilia, Brazil, Nov. 6, 2005

To read more great Dubya quotes go to http://www.dubyaspeak.com

Watching Callie (aka Dumb A$$) is NOT cheap entertainment. I repeat – watching Dumb A$$ is NOT cheap entertainment. Last night Callie was playing with 3 other dogs at the neighbor’s house. Callie was having a great time. All of the sudden she bolted (and I mean BOLTED) and ran to “greet” another dog, named L., in another yard. (What Callie’s exact intentions were is not clear.) L. was tied up and on her own property. Callie was not tied up or on a leash. (My bad.) A fight ensued between L. and Callie. Callie was on her back and L. was on top of her. I was screeching at the top of my lungs. Neighbors ran out of their homes to see what the commotion was about. L.’s owners came out and suddenly the fight ended. The entire incident only took a matter of seconds. No humans were hurt. As far as I know L. was not injured. About 30 minutes after the fight I saw a spot of blood next to Callie’s left eye. I called the vet. The vet came over and looked at Callie. I had to ask L.’s owners if L. had had a rabies shot recently. They answered, “Yes.” The vet didn’t have to give Callie a booster rabies shot (thank God), but Dumb A$$ was given three days worth of oral antibiotics and some topical antibiotic for her small wound. (It’s more of a small gash than a puncture wound. Things could have been MUCH worse.) L.’s owners came over to our house while the vet was treating Callie which was nice of them. Geez….did I feel like the scum of the earth. The bill from the vet was $130. Callie got what was coming to her. She ran after a dog that was hooked up on its own property. So….what’s the lesson today boys and girls????? Dogs are animals and animals are unpredictable. If you think your sweet little dog would never hurt another dog then think again. L. (a sweet heart doggie) has never attacked another dog. Callie (a dumb a$$ Golden) has never attacked another dog. Callie has lost the privilege of being able to run off the leash. The liability is way to high. I’m just grateful that things didn’t turn out worse.

So we are taking care of my mom’s 2 year old Golden Retriever named Callie (aka “Dumb Dumb”.)Overall, she’s a good dog but she’s “slightly off” if you know what I mean. She doesn’t bark at anything, at any time, under any circumstances. My mom and I have heard her bark once and when she did she startled herself. Kind of like,” OMG…what was that sound”?

Callie watches TV. Seriously, she really pays attention to what’s going on. She puts her nose right up to the screen. Her favorite programs are Andre Rieu (sp?) on public television, Clifford The Big Red Dog, and cop shows (because the sound of the siren gets her excited.)

When she gets bored of watching tv she watches the fish while sitting on my husband’s Lazy Boy recliner.

We used to have a hermit crab that she loved dearly. She developed a relationship with it. (No, I’m not kidding.) She loved to watch the crab walking around in its tank. I think she saw the crab tank as another tv set. Again, she would put her nose right up to the tank. She would whine at the crab, but not bark. Sometimes she would “paw” the tank and try to “eat” the crab through the glass. The crab loved her. It was a true love story. The crab would walk right up to Callie and beat his antennas at her. Normally, the crab would retract into his shell if he saw movement, but not with Callie. He was not afraid of her. He loved her. They had an animal-to-animal/cross species connection. Animal magnetism at its finest.

The following are my favorite George W. Bush quotes:

1.) “Too many good doc’s are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN’s aren’t able to practice their love with women all across the country.” – Polar Bluff, Missouri, Sept. 6 2004

2.) “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” Washington, DC Aug. 5, 2004

(If you are a 9/11 conspiracy theorist you HAVE to love quote #2!)

3.) “We need to apply 21st century information technology to the health care field. We need to have our medical records put on the I.T.” Collinsville, Illinois Jan. 5, 2005

4.) “I’m honored to shake the hand of a brave Iraqi citizen who had his hand cut off by Saddam Hussein.” Washington, DC May 25, 2004

5.) “I like the idea of running for office. There’s a positive effect when you run for office. Maybe some will run for office and say, vote for me, I look forward to blowing up America. I don’t know, I don’t know if that will be their platform or not. But it’s – I don’t think so. I think people who generally run for office say, vote for me, I’m looking forward to fixing your potholes, or making sure you got bread on the table.” – On Elections in the Middle East – Washington, DC, March 16, 2005

6.) “In this job you’ve got a lot on your plate on a regular basis; you don’t have much time to sit around and wander; lonely, in the Oval Office, kind of asking different portraits, ‘How do you think my standing will be?’ ” Washington DC, March 16, 2005

7.) “I’m also mindful that man should never try to put words in God’s mouth. I mean, we should never ascribe natural disasters or anything else, to God. We are in no way, shape or form should a human being play God.” Appearing on ABC’s 20/20, Washington, DC, Jan. 14, 2005

Quotes By Dick Cheney:

1.) “Let us rid ourselves of the fiction that low oil prices are somehow good for the United States.” Washington, DC, Oct. 1986

2.) “If you want to leave all the lights on in your house, you can. There’s no law against it. But you will pay for it.”
Washington, DC, May 19, 2001

3.) “Conservation may be a sign of personal virtue, but it is not a sufficient basis for a sound, comprehensive energy policy.” Toronto, Canada April 30, 2001

4.) “I had other priorities in the sixties than military service.” Washington Post, April 5, 1989

a relatively cheap source of entertainment. (The bird feeders are a one time cost and the food we use is sort of inexpensive.) We have five bird feeders in the backyard. Two take sunflower seeds, one takes suet, and two take nyger seed. Yesterday we had a plethora of birds feeding in the backyard – goldfinches, cardinals, bluejays, downy woodpeckers, hairy woodpeckers, tufted titmice, and rose-breasted grosbeak. I like to watch the goldfinches fight for supremacy of the hanging birdfeeder which hangs right outside my kitchen window.

Fox Vomica (noun) – The homeopathic medicine one uses to cure the ill feeling one experiences after watching The Factor

Used in context:

I watched the Factor last night and afterwards I experienced symptoms of nausea and vomiting. The next day I went to the doctor and he gave me some Fox Vomica pills. I took them and felt better.

while I am listening to Run DMC on my mp3 player and wonder if my 83 year old next door neighbor hears me. Would he dare to knock on my door to ask, “What’s up? What’s all the racket about?”

I LOVE to watch the Jewelry Television channel (for cheap entertainment purposes only). The women selling the products get SO exicted. I bet most of them are probably former cheerleaders. Everything about the show has a sense of urgency. “Only 70 of these wonderful, high quality rings are left! You must call NOW! These rings are flying off the shelf ladies.”

I want to have the enthusiasm and the zest for life that these women have. Their love of jewelry seems to be so authentic, so real. How do they sustain that level of enthusiasm hour after hour? Drugs? Lack of sleep? Delusions of grandeur? Is the Jewelry Apocalypse coming? It just doesn’t seem human to me – that’s why I find the Jewelry Television Channel incredibly entertaining.