find out who I am as a person

ive always just based myself on what others want me to be and now i dont know what i want to be who i want to me or what kind of person i want to be

Here I am…20 years old, living in the heart of the city…and I really don’t have much of a to-do list when I wake up. No hobbies, no sporting event, no store that I could frequent…no coffee with my name on it at the local shop. I really don’t have a routine to my life.

Sure, I have a 2 yr old daughter, and wonderful boyfriend I enjoy the company of whenever we get the chance…but what am I doing to myself?

Perhaps…instead of taking these “steps” forward like you’re supposed to when you grow up…I’m taking steps back.

When I was a kid I could tell you activities I liked to do, bands I favored, instruments I would try and play, card games I would enjoy…but now? I wake up, get the kid dressed, take her to school, go to work, pick her up, and sometimes take her to the sitter while I see the boyfriend, or even take her to family for a week so they can spend time with her. But…I couldn’t tell you what my favorite activities are…hmmm. Perhaps this year, even though it has already flown, I should build some character, without being too liberal.

I have been married 8 years and in a relationship before that for 5 years. I am 26 years old and I don´t know who I am. I have always been his girlfriend or his wife and i have always been the person who is on the side waiting to find out what I am to do next or what errand to run for someone….I want to do things that are for me. not revolve my life around someone else.