memorize a poem

is it easy

I’m still figuring this one out; it’s a continuation of the previous line in the poem.

I think it means that comparing myself doesn’t get me anywhere, because at the end of the day, whether I have decided that I am better than other people or that I’m worse off, I’m still going to be wrong. Change who I compare myself to and I will get a different answer every single time. How am I supposed to feel good about anything I decide regarding this when any answer is continually challenged? Plus, if I try to compare myself to any one person, I am going to be better than them at some things, but worse at others, and that doesn’t really get me to any conclusions at all.

But this is one I’m definitely still figuring out. A little while back I went to receive penance and I told the priest about my jealousy problem. It’s not really a problem for anyone but me, because I would never try to spite anyone I’m jealous of (in fact, I’m much nicer to them to try to compensate for my internal guilt – which makes me feel worse). He said it would help if I would try to focus on the things I do well. I’m not so sure what they are, because again, I’m comparing myself to what other people in the world do. So maybe I run fast, or I work hard or have accomplished high honors, but I can’t decide whether or not I really do these things well because I can only determine this when I compare myself to other people. Ummm…

Present Goals:
1) A Dream Within A Dream – DONE

2) The World Is Too Much With Us
3) Ozymandias

A Dream Within A Dream
by Edgar Allen Poe, 1827

Take this kiss upon the brow!

And, in parting from you now,

Thus much let me avow-

You are not wrong, who deem

That my days have been a dream;

Yet if hope has flown away

In a night, or in a day,

In a vision, or in none,

Is it therefore the less gone?

All that we see or seem

Is but a dream within a dream.

I stand amid the roar

Of a surf-tormented shore,

And I hold within my hand

Grains of the golden sand-

How few! yet how they creep

Through my fingers to the deep,

While I weep-while I weep!

O God! can I not grasp

Them with a tighter clasp?

O God! can I not save

One from the pitiless wave?

Is all that we see or seem

But a dream within a dream?

This is too long so I will split the line into two entries (continued tomorrow).

I compare myself with others all the time. :p I think it’s a silly way to measure yourself; it doesn’t really work. Sometimes you’ll end up overestimating yourself (becoming vain) or underestimating yourself (becoming bitter). And there’s no way to decide which way you should really be estimating yourself, because your environment and the people you compare yourself to always change. But we don’t naturally know how else to measure ourselves, since we’ve grown up being shown that life should be a big competition against others. The richest people have the best things, the most attractive people can find partners most easily, the most intelligent people are the ones that we should look up to in society.

Okay…I will admit that I have been putting this off because I don’t know exactly what this line means to me. But getting my first two cheers on this goal at once is like a little poke in the ribs to keep going. :P

I can see the straightforward meaning, but the reason why I love this poem is that many lines are meaningful to me because I have personally learned these lessons myself.

Maybe this is a warning…to teach me something before I have to experience it the hard way. I think I already enjoy the quiet, so I don’t have to be told to avoid loud and aggressive persons.

But maybe it’s also a little nudge in the right direction, because I recently had been thinking that I had a duty to get along with everybody. And I still think I sort of do. Then again, I realize that if trouble isn’t yet at your doorstep, you shouldn’t go actively looking for it. I’m going to come across enough “vexations to the spirit” in my life anyway; I don’t need to make it my business to find any more.

Well, that entry turned out better than I thought. See, I could have saved myself a lot of worry about this topic…I might not have known the answer, but I didn’t have to worry about it too. And the next line, whenever I get to it, is something that I can easily understand so I can look forward to writing about it next time! (:

My favorite of hers is:
“The doorkeeper has feet seven fathoms long,
and his sandals are made from five ox-hides;
it took ten cobblers to fashion them.”

But I don’t think I’m going to do that one. The problem with Sappho and other Greek Lyric poets is that all the poetry is in fragments. So if I just memorize a fragment is it okay, since nobody knows if there’s more to it or not? Let’s say it is okay. In which case, I will do this one by Sappho:
“The moon has set,
and the Pleiades; it is
midnight, and time passing;
and I lie alone.”

That one’s kind of depressing though. I like the first one better. Maybe I’ll keep looking.
Opinions, anyone? Favorite poems? Suggestions?

The first part of the line, “speak your truth quietly and clearly,” means to me (at this point in my life) that whatever I think and believe should be put forth in a way that doesn’t force others to bend to my desires, but instead will allow them to choose to believe/disbelieve me out of their own free will. But I must tell people what I think clearly, so that they may understand and so that nothing will be lost or overlooked.

I learned that I must listen to others today. I called my father and told him that I love him (even though he yelled at me today). Then I learned that although I thought he’s just crazy and angry all the time, he actually is a rational person and that there is a good reason for all he says and does, even if I don’t know or understand why. I see now that everyone has their story, and that everyone is worth listening to; they too have their truths.

I think this means to stand up for your beliefs, while maintaining harmony with everyone you meet. I’m a little lacking in the “standing up for myself” part. I tend to want to walk the middle road and try to reconcile opposing viewpoints in order to keep the peace. I don’t know, I’ve seen some people who are very opinionated get criticized for being so “overbearing” with their beliefs, and the same person be praised for being so “firm and resolute.”

I suppose it’s time I stood behind what I think is right, even if I’m afraid other people think I’m crazy.

Silence…sometimes, when I pray, it actually helps to stop the tape playing in my head of all the worries, all the stresses, all the concerns, all the things I need to do and have not yet done, all the things I’ve done and could have done better. I suppose when I have silence, I should appreciate it better. Most of the time, though, the tape interrupts. I’ve tried saving those thoughts for when I have nothing else to do, like when I’m waiting in line or waiting for a bus.

But to “go placidly amid the noise and haste”...I don’t think I understand how to be peaceful in myself when everything else is crazy. There is a quote that says, “peace. it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.” Perhaps the only way you can have this peace is to find God in all things…recent experiences have led me to search more for God in everything, as it is the truth…and I feel slightly better when I do.

What is the definition of peace, anyway? Says the dictionary:

inner contentment; serenity
unaffected by disturbance; calm and unruffled

I think I can try for that. With God in my life and all things, I don’t have to worry, even in high-stress situations.