be a better mother to my children

I mark this off now, because I don’t know what else I can do to make me a “better mother”. I love my children more than anything in this world. Everything I do is for them. I let them do things they want to do & I buy them things they want. We do things together and I give them room to grow on their own. They are and always will be my everything. I think that makes me a damn good mom!

On Monday my 5 year old son starts Kinder. He’s not too thrilled at the idea. To be honest neither am I. Although I know it would good for him…the selfish mommy who doesn’t want her kids to grow up is taking over. I’m more anxious about it than he is, I’m doing my best to keep it under control. I think he will be ok though.

I get to go with him the first day. It’s from 9-1030 and then the following day he goes the full day 845-1215. I’m really excited about being able to attend with him. I know deep down inside I’ll be fighting back tears. Both sad & happy ones. I’m such a sap! I really want to get him excited about school…lord knows his father and I weren’t lol and I don’t want our kids to end up like us.

Not that we ended up bad…but Id love for my son to really like school & enjoy the great times it can offer. ♥ tonight I’ll make him his favorite dinner to celebrate his time to be a “big boy” ♥ cries my babies are all growing up!

It was nice. I left from work a tad bit early & drove the long drive up to Roseville to get my oldest son from my sisters house. We talked the whole way home about our vacation plans & his future in school & his sports. It was one of the best talks we’ve ever had.

He told me how he wants to go to college in Florida & how he wants to play basketball and baseball maybe even football but the first two for sure. He says he wants to go pro in basketball :] I encouraged it all told him to go for his dreams. and told him Id better get a nice house out of it!! :]

I thought of all the great memories we had going to A’s games when he was 2. He and I had season tickets and would go to games every week. I think thats where his love of the game came from :] It was such a great ride Im so happy I got that time alone with him. Im even happier that my son has great goals. College is in his future & I could not be more proud of my son.

I was watching the dreaded DR.Phil…there was this lady who literally beat her kids & yelled at them like OMG I can’t even describe it was hard to watch. I felt horrible for anytime may have raised my voice at my kids. I’m not like that woman by any means…but it made me realize I do want to have more time together learning new things as a family. She called the welfare people to tell them how she had been treating her family… :( my kids are my everything…I could NEVER do anything to them that would risk them being taken away. I dont understand how any parent could. Thankfully that woman got help.

Im not exactly sure what it is I need to do? I want to be a better mother…but what would make me a better mother? I may have picked a goal that I wasnt sure of. I should have made the goal a little more specific I think. Maybe Ill edit this? I think Im a pretty good mom…just have a few things I would like to do more or get better at. Yes, thats it Ill edit this goal.

Now that I am a single Mom this is a real challenge. I need more quality time (which is hard to do since I am working MORE to be able to keep us all cared for). They are really good boys…ages 10 & 11 & I owe them my best. I know I am a good mom to them now, but I want to be a GREAT mom to them.