remember - Life is short, so live it up, drink it down, laugh it off, avoid the drama, take chances, and never have regrets, because at one point everything you did was exactly what you wanted

is having no regrets. Part of being an adult is having the ability to look back, evaluate and critique my actions. While something may have seemed perfectly fine when I was young and single, as the mother of a teenage daughter I feel differently now.

I’m trying to enjoy life without having a negative impact on my child. She deserves to have a parent she can look up to. I’m not perfect and I don’t claim to be, but I try to be a good person.

I think you should make every day an experience and live it to its fullest.

This has consistantly been one of my most-cheered goals.

I often wonder what people are thinking when they cheer it. For me, this goal is about remembering that taking a laid back approach to yourself is good. Forgiving yourself is good. Being in the moment is good. Regrets are not only bad, but simply ridiculous.

I have done a lot of good for myself since I first adopted this goal. I’ve just re-read some of my old entries, and remembered the state of mind I used to be in—always running myself down, always feeling inferior, always feeling small and ashamed. I don’t do that anymore.

In the past few months I have blossomed into one of the most confident people I know. I don’t think I’m vain or stuck up, but I have a very healthy respect for my own talents and blessings. I don’t feel embarrassed any more about admitting that I have a lot to give. I recognize that not everyone will think the best of me, but I am honestly coming to a place where I can see that is THEIR issue, not mine. I don’t have the responsibility of being everyone’s idea of perfect.

At first, self-hating thoughts used to swarm through my head. I could hardly go a minute without thinking something mean and judgemental about myself. Saying anything nice about myself was nearly impossible. Being here on 43T has helped me so much, though! I’ve come to recognize that I have plenty of good qualities. I am able to be a blessing to many people. Mistakes I may have made in the past are not the definition of who I am. I have learned to love myself, trust myself, and be proud of myself.

I would mark this goal as “done”, but I don’t want to take it down from my front page. I like seeing it there, constantly reminding myself and others that life is good if we let it be. Life is largely a matter of perspective.

Wow, funny how hard this hit me when I read it. The last couple of months have kicked my ass emotionally, spiritually, financially and physically. It has been one thing after the next and it has been non-stop. Slowly but surely I have changed from a positive person into a negative person. My heart has turned black and I have been angry. It all came to a head last Friday night. Saturday morning I looked at my husband with tears in my eyes and told him: “I don’t like myself, I don’t like you and I don’t like the kids falling asleep every night to us arguing. I am not going to do this any longer. Either we can learn to talk to each other nicely or I won’t talk to you any more, period. I had an epiphany the other night. I may not be able to control your attitude but I can control mine.” So, I’m getting some help. I’m reading some books about finding my strengths and having a weekly counseling session. I am getting something done everyday that needs to get done. When I get rattled instead of striking out I am asking myself what it is that I can do to make the situation better. I have asked my children for forgiveness and apologized to them for the way I spoke to their father/grandfather and promised to do better. I am reminding myself daily that happiness is a choice and that at one point everything I do is exactly what I want. I want to be a happy and positive person again. That is exactly what I want.

Life is short. The time we get here is the time we should enjoy. Love the people that matter, enjoy those moments that you never want to forget, forget the moments that don’t matter. Forget the people that set out to make your life hurt. Treasure those moments of pure joy. We all have them, but sometimes we are so wrapped in all the hurt and we do not see them. Take one moment in your day to realise that each and every day there is at least one moment where we are free to breathe, free to love, free to enjoy. Grasp those moments, because those moments are the times you will recall when you are old and grey (hopefully) and you will thankfull for them. Regret nothing, each experience is a lesson.

...but, as it’s rather large for that, having it pop up regularly will serve as a reminder…it makes me smile, too!

this goal more than ever right now.

I saw it listed on my friend Dana’s list and had to adopt it. Every time I see it I am uplifted.

Too cool not to adopt [2]

I saw this on ihaveneatstuff’s goals list, and it sounded too cool not to adopt. It pretty much sums up my ground-state for keeping balanced.

I especially love the “never have regrets, because…” part. It’s true. We can’t beat ourselves up for doing what we thought was the best option at the time. We can learn from it. We can make new decisions in the future. But we should never regret that at one time we made choices that with our current perspective we wouldn’t make again.

If we hadn’t made those “wrong” choices at one point, we’d never have learned why the “better” choices were so much better.