Make new friends and be a good friend to the ones I have

I’ll be moving abroad 3 months from now to pursue a masters degree. Until then I want to meet my friends as often as I possibly can and after I leave the country I will do my best to stay in touch. Thanks to the internet, facebook, skype etc. I have no excuse for not staying in touch! :)

At the same time I really want to meet some new people and make some new friends at the university.

So the sub-goal for this one is to meet my friends as often as I can, call them more ofter, stay in touch when I move abroad and be social and outgoing so I can get to know more wonderful persons.

My few friends believe that I make friends very easily. However, I think that I missed something in the “Who to consider a friend” class. I have a few friends because the others who claim me as a friend, I don’t think qualify to be my friend. When I observe how they treat their other friends-talking behind their backs, intense jealousy for what they have, always focusing on the negative-I immediately have a distrust of them. I am almost certain that I am not looking at friendship quite right. Maybe I should look past some of these traits and widen my circle of friends with the knowledge that there may be some drama. As one of my acquaintances shared with me, a little drama in one’s life is good.

On the other side of my goal is my treatment of my friends. There is so much that I could do better. I could send cards for special occasions consistently, call more, and have little get-togethers at my house. I get so caught up in my day-to-day activities and my family that I hardly ever build in social time with friends. So I will make that one of my goals as well.

Sometimes I think I was a man in a former life. Especially when it comes to tolerating the mind games that I see many women play for no reason. I am not talking about the games they play in their romantic relationships that’s another conversation all together. I am talking about the games we play with each other.

I took my daughter to a birthday party yesterday. The girls at the party were between the ages of 9 and 12. Their independence left us moms to converse on our own. AHHHHH! Once you’re an adult it’s not cute to play dumb. It’s NEVER cute to play dumb. So why are these 30 something women pretending to be offended by learning how to use a hammer or a drill. Many of their daughter’s were little cutesy clones. Afraid to mess up their hair if they played the party games. I stayed because my daughter really wanted to be there. The whole time I am thinking I should grab Neem and make a run for it. During the summer I invited the guest of honor over to play. She wore platforms and a split skirt. This ruled out the park date I had in mind. This family is always inviting Neem to events and playdates. Leaving me deprogramming her for days. I have to save myself. I can’t do this on a regular basis. In this case being a friend means walking away before something stupid is said.

Okay, I have some kissing up to do. I have a friend I was supposed to hang out with this weekend and I stood her up. Not intentionally, I was just exhausted. I know I hurt her feelings. She’s a singlemom and it’s alot easier for her to get up and go. But she doesn’t understand that. Not only that but her kids eat alot less than mine. She can buy a couple of burgers and her family is good to go. I need a couple sandwiches per family member just to hold them until I finish cooking.Thats before I figure my neanderthal husband into the picture. All excuses aside I need to plan some time to spend with her. I don’t call or go by. Ours has been an cyberspace relationship for convience sake (mostly on my part). It’s always fun when we get together.

I suck at going to the social gatherings (that are not kid related). I have another friend who had a goddess party. I put it in my calendar and ignored it. I have to do better. The Fam has been begging me to get out for myself more. There just always seems to be something else to do and when there is not all I want to do is chill. I have some growing to do in this area for sure.