post my poetry here for 43Thingers to read.

A short history of religion
at night in my room
speak not of conflict,
i’ll open my mind to you.

Every idea from the past 6 months
leaves my head
via unknown channels
when I break this writing fast

Illegible handwriting
immeasured breathing

(I make up words when it suits me)

It’s 10 pm
I won’t return
nor forfeit this bravery
which I hold onto so tight

I can’t blame this on you
when i’ve mastered self control
I choose to not be affected
Tonight it’s not happening to me

I’ll wake tomorrow to screwed-up paper
buried deep in my pockets
amidst old memories like regret
(I will shred these thoughts yet)

I’ll turn my cellphone off
I’ll turn my music on
Ears on, eyes shut
I lose sight of my direction

I hit a habit I left behind
I hit the wall at speed
dizzy head, ringing ears
I lie down and gulp in air

Saturday: night returns
who is with you now?
shuffling feet
one day to go.

Do you feel a little angry?
Hold your own hand tightly.
Things aren’t so bad
with a little company.

Over all of these years
never once did I swear.
I’ve stopped holding on
to things that have no meaning.
You’ve proved me wrong many a time,
and taught me the value of staying honest.

My memory never fails to forget
the verbal punches you threw.
I guess I haven’t learnt a thing
and that is why,
over all of these years,
never once did I swear.

I haven’t seen you for
three weeks, four days
six hours (but i’m not counting)

You said you’d come back
so you could see my smile
so I could give you a hug

I have a box of your things
that sits and waits in a
quiet corner of my room

When you’re ready to stop hiding
You’ll come back sometime.
You’ll come back won’t you?

^{Where is he?}

I had a poem in my head

but I stayed too long
before moving on
now it’s gone for good.

One day I might remember
a line, a phrase
or word

your face will spark old memories,
that poem may return.

An emptying room
please let me forget
reset my memory
take away the regret

knee deep in dusk
as I walk away
from what I left behind
start again, overnight.

She writes ‘there’s a boy in khaki shorts’
and 10,000 miles away from home
there is a boy in black jeans
standing in the doorway

If she knew what she wanted she’d tell him
but she forgets her stance
and falters
the seconds pass her by

there’s a boy in a leather jacket
and he waits by the window
then there’s the boy in black jeans
and he’s waiting for her to tell him

she can’t tell him what he wants
so she puts it off
he’ll never get it right
so he will never win

there’s a boy in a leather jacket
and he waits until she says
his manners make her nervous
but she always preferred formality

I drink so I can write
free flowing verse without intrusion
but as soon as I climb into bed
my head begins to fall.
So I scribble across the page,
pulling lines out of my pen.
Desperate to reach the
end before my head.

Reality hits harder than you.
Everyone should be taught that.
Unless a less persistant girl,
braved the odds, like I.
You’ll be excused, and i’ll fill her in.
Never does your friendship fail to make me smile.

^{can’t think of a name for this, suggestions welcome :)}