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Learn to let go of the past


 

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How to learn to let go of the past



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Sofia Bush is smashing her brain for a nice sleep

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feuerfrei is working on achieving a goal - so I can add another one to the list!

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My horrible past I can't forget - need some encouragment and support! 6 months ago

I apologize in advance, if my story is jumbled here and there and may confuse you.

At age 15, I was befriended by female grade 12’er her name, Mariann, in high school. Things were all good, Mariann and I stayed friends, Her family moved 2 blocks away from my house, one time she joked saying it was closer to my house. But I never found it was anything. It wasn’t until she mentioned she had a “younger” half-brother who was very much interested in meeting me, he saw my profile on one of those websites(e.g friendster), that things became a little more interesting.

At this time also, my childhood friends whom I known for 10 years or more turned their backs on me when I became the “popular” girl in school. It was hard to learn and deal with the rumors and upfront b.s talking in class. etc. etc..


Back to the brother—“He” didn’t go to the same school, lived with his real mom, Mariann she spoke so highly of him. He appeared to be a nice guy, But… stupid me, I “hoped” I would meet him one day just because she kept talking about him.

I never met “him” in real life, only through the internet which I never let myself truly believe it was real. Although, exchanging pictures and emails to one another was pretty much it. This “guy” apparently fell in love with me, he appeared nice, honest, overall a good person. The only thing holding me back from believing this is true was a physical opportunity to meet this person. There were plenty of times he would say, that we were at the same place same time but nothing happened?! (I’ll be honest, this prolonged because I began to care for this “guy” I never met, but as an internet friend. It made sense to me, that we should have met because if he liked me so much than its better to meet in person. He said it was too early and he was tooo shy. So I obliged still keeping my guard up. )

Through-out the year-and some months long friendship, she had a bountiful stories of her “brother” and only a couple people (her long long long time friends-who I think never knew the true story why and how I met her in the first place) to back it up and followed by photos. At first it became hard to believe all this was true, I wanted to many times just tell her to f*-off and get out of this confusing mess. But she was a really good friend, never made any gestures that she was a psycho or anything.

I eventually, stopped talking to her one day when I caught her talking to herself, and it was an actual conversation she had with herself. I got completely creeped out, and started to put the pieces together. She rebelled and vandalized my house, abused my dogs, and stalked me for few days school and work before 2 restraining orders were put on her. One day had her mom, come to my work in person, to tell me that this “guy” i chat with was her step-son.



Long long story short, through a lot of manipulation, I found out she was behind the rumors, losing my childhood friends, moving 2 blocks away, and was behind the mysterious “guy” was her all along.
I honestly had a feeling something was up, but there was never enough evidence to prove my suspicion was true. The friendship with her was through my eyes, a regular friendship you have with a chick. Chill, gossip, shopping, coffee. and that’s it.


I was too scared and absolutely embarrassed to tell anyone. I was scared of what anyone would say. I told my parents she was just a friend who had some mental issues when the house got vandalized.

I felt manipulated, disgusted, violated I let this happen to myself. and ever since then, I find I have trouble in areas of trusting new people I met, old friends, it’s also the time of me losing my childhood friends has affected my self-esteem.

I’m tired of carrying this baggage, I’ve tried to let it go, but it’s still there.



Sofia Bush is smashing her brain for a nice sleep

let go of what kills you 9 months ago

when it’s killing you, why suffer every single day of your life with an evil creature like your boyfriend? i had my share of story as well and i did the most important choices of my life: to live away from him!



chelseaXcholo is sitting.

Everyone changes. 15 months ago

And there’s no sense in trying to make people stay the same.
Just let go. It will make you feel so much better. I know I did. One day I was just like, you know what, if these people are not going to appreciate what I do for them, then I don’t need them in my life. It’s great.



musicalsunglasses needs cash . . .

Untitled 17 months ago

this past year has been horibble for me. :/ all because of one thing i let get into my head. i cant forgive myself because i’m embarrased that if i see him again he’ll find out what a wreck i am. i always want to be better and try to live up to what he would like. but i guess i just have to face that he doesn’t like me and move on. right?



dont no how 19 months ago

i have a terrible past starting at age 6 and i dont no how to let it go. i want to act, and to trust peaple, but i dont no how. i have a problem you see, i hold it in. only around 8 or less people know. i keep it all bottled up deep in side and i didnt tell anyone except for those 8 people. mi life is getting better, but it just hurts to much to bring up, and once i do, i usually burst into tears. What should i do?



shooting myself in the foot. 23 months ago

I have the world’s greatest boyfriend. He loves me, treats me like a princess and wants to marry me. The problem is I can’t let go of the fact that he was married before. He married an old girlfriend who was an exchange student from japan and she was being forced to go back. The marriage ended horrible with her leaving him and cheating on him, in barely over a year. He has told me hundreds of times that he never would have married her if he hadn’t been pressured into it by her and her parents, and that it was never a real marriage. He has also said that he never wanted to grow old with her, or travel with her, or have children with her- all things that he talks about doing with me constantly. I know she’s a horrible person who used a wonderful boy to stay in the country, but I can’t seem to get over it. I feel like less than her and the idea of coming second to her makes me ill. I am very afriad that I’m slowly going to poison a perfect relationship by not being able to get over something that ended over four years ago, and has no place in our lives currently. ick. I just keep shooting myself in the foot.



Untitled 2 years ago

When I was 17, I traveled halfway around the world just to visit him. That must mean something! I just can’t leave him alone!



Untitled 2 years ago

just cant do it.



Untitled 2 years ago

i feel like a part of me is letting go of him, because it might sound silly but being around him or in a conversation in general (even though its with many other people) doesnt feel so weird anymore. i hope we can be friends



Forget 2 years ago

I want so badly to forget all the crap in my past and just MOVE ON! I spend so much time thinking about all these regrets, I hold very deep grudges, it’s just gotta stop. I don’t want to live like this, I have too much to look forward to to be thinking about that



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