why the disconnect?

not a state of being, simply absence of connection. then it comes easily.

I feel so good disconnected, watching everything happen from somewhere else. in this case, the disconnect is a good thing.

star-stuff

When I come home, there’s no mail.

community |kəˈmyoōnitē| noun ( pl. -ties)
1 a group of people living together in one place, esp. one practicing common ownership : a community of nuns. • all the people living in a particular area or place : local communities. • a particular area or place considered together with its inhabitants : a rural community. • ( the community) the people of a district or country considered collectively, esp. in the context of social values and responsibilities; society : preparing prisoners for life back in the community. • [as adj. ] denoting a worker or resource designed to serve the people of a particular area : community health services.
2 [usu. with adj. ] a group of people having a religion, race, profession, or other particular characteristic in common : Rhode Island’s Japanese community | the scientific community. • a body of nations or states unified by common interests : [in names ] the European Community | the African Economic Community.
3 a feeling of fellowship with others, as a result of sharing common attitudes, interests, and goals : the sense of community that organized religion can provide. • [in sing. ] a similarity or identity : writers who shared a community of interests. • joint ownership or liability : a commitment to the community of goods.
4 Ecology a group of interdependent organisms of different species growing or living together in a specified habitat : communities of insectivorous birds. • a set of species found in the same habitat or ecosystem at the same time. PHRASES the international community the countries of the world considered collectively. ORIGIN late Middle English : from Old French comunete, reinforced by its source, Latin communitas, from communis (see common ).

feel
anything

Because there’s nothing with which to connect.

Nothing.

because i bought an ipod.

a few months ago and I can’t stop thinking about it.
why do I shut myself off, shutting people out?
I’m not afraid, I just love to be alone and quiet.
Reading and tea and napping and just sitting, people don’t like to do these things with me, seems.
Disconnect to understand everything from outside myself? I think so. Sounds better than it is.
I just think I don’t like to feel. Who does?