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Not feel ugly


 

How to not feel ugly


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sofiasleeping forever trying to catch up

Untitled 6 days ago

I cut my hair. I like it shorter, I like feeling air brush across the back of my neck. I like that it only takes me about a minute to mess with my hair and then it actually looks okay.

I guess this one might sound silly, not feel ugly because of hair, but hair has been one of the banes of my existence for about as long as I can remember. Curly, lots of tangles, lots of frizz, nothing to do with it but put it in a ponytail or bun. Stress headaches.

When she cut the braid off it literally felt like I had lost pounds from my head, like the albatross falling off my neck or something, to be dramatic.

Let’s just say, this is related because I think I might actually, well, be closer to liking my hair now, like, hey, here’s one aspect of my appearance I can get behind. Ha…



sofiasleeping forever trying to catch up

alright, I'll make this brief.. 1 month ago

if I don’t do a brief update now I’ll tell myself I’ll get to it later and then it probably won’t happen :)

I read from someone’s “How I did it” about part of the problem stemming from being bi-racial in a place where just about everyone’s one flavor, so that reminded me of my own situation—I’m multiracial and it’s been years—YEARS—since school days when any dumb kid made a comment about it, but it’s like I haven’t developed enough to reliably shake it off any time someone says something about it now, even though I either know or am pretty sure they don’t mean their comments to be rude, especially when it’s a compliment/something positive about whatever, but I have this incredibly self-conscious kneejerk reaction and I just.feel.ugly.

These days comments about my racial/cultural mixup are only as weird and bad as I let them make me feel…

And when I talk about the comments made, I mean both based on appearance and details, of culture, religion, language speaking skills, etc. Why don’t I know more about this? Why don’t I speak that language? Why aren’t I this, why aren’t I that… all the “Why aren’t you…” questions for me at least chip away at the nothing I already feel like.

Today and all tomorrows are the best days to Not Feel Ugly. I’m not a child anymore. I’m about to turn 26, which puts me on that side of 30. Not that I’m all grown up, definitely not, but I have to come to terms with what I see in the mirror and how I feel about the person I am now.

I have to accept things I can’t change. I can’t change my pedigree, and I wish I could say I wouldn’t want to, and maybe someday I’ll get there.

I don’t have to be a victim and listen to people put me down for not being what they expect me to be based on my face, my name, my parents.

I can make up my own rules, because basically I wasn’t raised with many :) Just to be independent, self-sufficient, and happy. I wasn’t raised in any religion, I’m not part of any of the kinds of communities based around certain ethnic groups, I don’t identify really with anyone on the basis of culture, race, ethnicity, except for the closest thing is… here… sort of. Lance describes “people like me” in my generation as “media children” and in a way he’s right. I wasn’t fond of his tone or the implications he was making in the context of that conversation, but in this way I unwittingly lied.

I guess it’s called “American culture” or “Americanized” or the melting pot or whatever, but using that term unsettles me. Maybe because the definitions are constantly shifting, those definitions are multiple and vague. I need a way to say I was raised a blank slate, here, as a first generation US citizen, without affiliation to anything…

sigh. I think I’m gonna give up and just say I was adopted by white people and watch the question-askers go “Ohhhh” and then dash away before they think of other questions …

this entry had lots to do with Not Feeling Ugly.



Untitled 5 months ago

I used to feel really ugly, I was very self-concious. It started when I was growing up. Everybody would tell me that my sisters/couzins/friends are prettier than me or that I was less. You know, People can be really mean. and as a little girl it used to really get me. A year ago it really hit me, I said thats it, im not gonna put up with it. I think change has to be from with in. I actually relised that technically speaken i am far more lucky in the beauty department than alot of girls arround me. and that some would tell me that im ugly just to make themselves feel better. I discovered that I am really pretty, I became more confident. People started to notice. Even toxic-relatives who I grew up arround. Every one is wondering if I had a beauty procedure done on me. Seriously… to that extent. I really became more beatiful. And I get even more attention in the male department. Which felt very good.

Tips:
- Get rid of toxic people in your life. Give them a deaf ear.
- Surround yourself with people who genuinlly love you and care about you and tell you how beautiful you are no matter what.
- Take care of yourself, Eat right, loose the weight, change the style or do any thing makes you feel more beautiful even if for a little but. You really deserve it.
- CONFIDENCE.. is always the key to make beautiful.
- Be greatful for what you have. You are far more blessed than alot of people.
- Be sure that alot of girls would love to look like you, like you sometimes would love to look like some1 else or have their eyes or their body…etc..
- No one is Perfect. Every girl has her flaws. and we all have our low moments. But dont let that get to you..

Feel beautifull.. because you deserve it…



lucydoeseverything is procrastinating about the uni revision

it seems superficial; it isn't 5 months ago

I have struggled with crippling feelings of ugliness since i was about 13 (12 years ago!)and sometimes i feel so angry with myself. I am an intelligent woman with an interesting life, i am loved… so why do i hate myself at least half the time? I am determined to sort this out. If i find any conclusions i will report back to the community!



Everyone is Beautiful, if you are feeling down on your looks please read this. 6 months ago

Why do you need other people to evaluate your beauty.Are there not times where you look in the mirror and you love how you look and sweater. Then all of a sudden you may here a comment or try comparing yourself to superficial beauty. Do you understand you are already beautiful the ones who mock or bring haste are the ones envious. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Please already you have a sensitive heart, you know that outer image is not everything to be beautiful comes form within and it glows on your outerself. Do not let others win the more down you are the more negative energy it promotes. Please be positive, remember only you are in control of your mind make it beautiful because are very beautiful



huh 6 months ago

i think im ugly at college but people think im cute but i think im ugly. but now this site has helped me im not ugly i looked at the mirror and i looked emo thin and hot thanks people and special admin and my best friend and boyfriend jessica,christian i love him alot but he keeps being sad so i hugged him he said thanks so seeya.

love, angel.elena



Sure...i blame the media 6 months ago

I feel ugly all the time. With that feeling comes also a feeling of unworthiness because im ugly in this superficial society. We all just want to be loved. It sucks when you realize YOU may be the thing that keeps that from happening.



Ive felt this way all my life. 6 months ago

I feel Uglier everyday, honestly, im forced to go to school with these people who are all skinny and blonde and pretty. I dont get invited places with them, because im not skinny or blonde or pretty. Also ive never had a boyfriend. When i did like someone, one of my friends usually juts took him. Im really sick of this. I just want to feel Pretty. I wish someone would genuinly tell me im pretty and not lie. And i wish i could lose weight. But the fact im fat makes me want to eat more.



y am i like this 7 months ago

i feel ugly costantly
im fat
got side burns a moustache
and am really small
the only times boy talk to me is to find out about other girls or because of my boobs
i have had compliments about my eyes but what boy cares about eyes
my mum and dad always tell me you will pretty if you lost weight but it is to hard ive never had a boyfriend and im nearly 15 all my friends have had a bf but know boys like me and the wort thing is my bro saying im a beeg and that im fat and know one will ever like me and it makes me feel bad i just need somone to understand how i am feeling



MrsAmandaCullen I give up on life. I quit :"(

No one here is half as ugly as I am. 7 months ago

Well I’m fuked when it comes to looks. I have bad frizzy greasy hair not matter what shampoo or conditioners I use, I have acne on my face + chest + all over my back, I have bad teeth and on top of that I’m fat as a whale. I hate It when girls say “it’s the stuff on the inside that matters”. Well if that was true I doubt majority of girls would be single. Guys want looks (so I guess I’m fuked!) and girls only say that to feel good about themselves. I’m 16, have no friends, no boyfriend (never had one and probably will be alone forever). The only clothes I wear are sweatpants and giant oversized shirts even on hot summer days because I’m that disgusted with myself. My mum says my acne and my weight gain is just a teen phase and that EVERYONE goes through it. Well I’ll be damned! All the girls at my school are skinny, pretty and had flawless skin. Where did I go wrong?....



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