Capture my thoughts at the end of the day

Am currently sitting while waiting for my take away dinner. Am in Penang for work, 2 nights here for meetings and such. I have all my kit for some R&R too, a few bars of chocolate and a few episodes of my fave shows. And they think i’m all work and no play! Hah!

..from this site, but I haven’t forgotten about it that’s for sure.

Things have been very hectic for me. I won’t go into the mundane details here, but that’s partly why I haven’t been very active here lately.

The weekend is already over. Monday is here, at least for the last half an hour (already 12:32pm). I should be sleeping, but wanted to drop a quick post here.

The weekend.. as usual, over in a blur. A facial appointment, brunch with a girlfriend, my usual trek to pick up my son at his dad’s, a solo movie outing to catch Jumper and an impulse shopping spree at a bookstore.

I do wish my life could slow down considerably. :S

I’ve been busy. Practised my mind mapping skills, had lots of fun. Magic markers have always been my medium. :)

Wanted to go see Jumper, that didn’t happen. Disappointed but was able to do other stuff. Not too bad a loss. Always next week.

My diet is on a good track, no rice for the last 3 days. Had some today while I was at my sister’s. Very nice. I should be sorted to be go rice-less for the next 3 days.

Had a chat with V. Been a while. We normally chat at the office, but I’ve not been around my desk much lately. I always enjoy our conversations, both real and virtual. He has a very calming presence.

Work is never done, but I am, at least for tonight. I miss my friends, it’s been a quiet weekend, but I opted to stay home so that I could rest and be productive. And not spend too much since payday is only next Wednesday!

Monday, here I come..

..but I need to get a few more stuff done.

It’s been a really long day. By the time I got home, my fuse was really short.

Ammar tells me he has to be in school early tomorrow. The problem is, there’s no car available at home since mine’s at the workshop and I’m driving the CRV to work. I really don’t want to deal with this in the middle of the night. Then he tells me he needs to buy a pair of boy scouts outfit. When I ask him how much and where is it sold, he just shrugs and gives me a blank look. Arrgghhh..!

Really, when the going gets tough, the crap just piles on..!

..leaves me with mixed feelings. I know I badly need to rest but there’s so much I want to do.

Tomorrow and Friday will be public holidays, courtesy of the Chinese New Year festivities. I’m told our country has one of the most days gazetted as public holidays. Now that is surely a good thing.

As I’m typing this, the firecrackers are burning away. Fizz, bangs and pops with the occasional boom. It’s not so bad, they’re pretty far away from my neighbourhood. Plus am not about to go to bed yet.

As usual, today went by in a blur of whirlwind activities. I do wish I wasn’t so caught up in my daily tasks. I wish i ws more laid back and that I’d pace myself. But who am I kiddin’? This is how I’m wired. I might as well accept this fact and figure out how to shift down gears when it’s time to rest and relax. Like now..

My son has left to go to his dad’s place. I missed saying goodbye to him cause my ex arrived much earlier. It always leaves me feeling sad, not being able to hug my son before he goes off. Four days until I see him again. I called him as soon as I got home. He sounds cheerful and happy to be with his dad. What boy wouldn’t, especially the prospect of a 4-day weekend, no school, minimal homework and continuous gaming on the PS2. It’s been almost 4 years now and there’s no getting used to this.

The theme for the weekend is balance. Making sure I make time for family, work, play and rest. Saturday will be spent attending a wedding. With my brother gone for the weekend, I am the designated family driver. I don’t mind, one day out of four. I can hack it. It’s a day trip anyway and it’s not everyday that I’d drive 500 miles to attend some wedding. Note to self: be nice about it cause this will major brownie points with mum and dad.

I don’t feel like socialising but I know I should get out and make the effort. Again, it’s all about balance. Don’t know who is available, some folks may already have plans. Well, I’ll give it a try anyway. Worse case scenario, I wouldn’t mind catching Sweeney Todd all by myself since a certain someone swore off watching musicals.

to be continued..

..to succumb to desperation!

Attended training all day today. Took the train but suffered on the way back, it was jam packed with rush hour commuters and I had to stand the whole way home. :(

Went to check out the Toyota Vios. The price isn’t as expensive as I thought it’d be. Told E about it and he tried to talk me into getting the MyVi instead. I wish he was more supportive where the Vios was concerned. :S

My inbox was a mile long. I exaggerate obviously, but it feels like it. My VPN performance is slow tonight, must be all those people logging in to finalise their performance appraisals, like me!!

I have a meeting at 3:30pm tomorrow, a big one. I’m not quite ready and panic is slowly invading my consciousness. Breathe.. breathe..

I need to cancel some appointments tomorrow. The appraisal meetings can wait, they’re important enough for me not to rush through them (like I always do).

Don’t panic.. I have time, hell.. I’ll make time! I can do this!

Spent first half of the day with S. We had brunch, talked, had drinks, talked, checked out phones, talked some more. It felt good talking to S, he always make feel less freakish, trust me that’s a good thing!

The second half of the day was spent at home. Tired, tried to get some sleep. No luck! Had endless streams of people coming over to the house. Relatives and such. Fought exhaustion and tried my level best to be hospitable.

This weekend is one of those rare times when I wish I lived alone. I just can’t deal with people, especially not those I have to deal with when I really don’t feel like it.

As usual I have a fair amount of things to do. I’ve got a few things done. Gonna hack away at one or two things before I call it a night. I’m still exhausted, I wish I wasn’t. I wished I could feel a bit more enthusiastic. But somehow the blah cloud that descended upon me last Friday is yet to lift fully.

“If it’s to be, it’s up to me”. I saw this quote on one of my friend’s Facebook site. I know how true this is, but I can’t seem to will myself to do much lately. Maybe getting more sleep might do the trick. Heck, I’ll try anything right now if it’ll make feel better.

It’s been a long day. Hardly sat down long enough to get any real work done. It’s already 10pm and I’m toying with the idea of staying up. But I know I’ll be useless tomorrow if I don’t get enough rest.

Main thought of the days: I admire my new boss more and more each day. I have a very good feeling about this. The feeling one gets when you know you’re on a winning team. :)

by day, absolutely useless at night.

:S

It’s 2 days into the new year. I have many goals that need updating but I can’t spare the time for this just yet. Soon, I hope.

Just got home from a farewell dinner. A colleague is leaving us after 21 years of service. We had Japanese fusion food for dinner. My boss picked the menu. He asked if I enjoyed it, I said it was OK but perhaps I wasn’t convincing enough. He said I looked happier eating rice.. :p

We had coffee afterwards. Both bosses smoke heavily, one on cigars the other one chain-smokes Dunhills. I came home reeking of tobacco. Luckily my dad didn’t feel incline to comment on this.

I had the stupidest wardrobe malfunction! My skirt had a big tear on the side and despite my best effort to stitch it up, it didn’t help matters. The skirt was absolutely ruined and i don’t think I could ever wear it again. I had to go buy a pair of pants before the dinner. Found a pair of black linen pants, not my first choice but I was desperate. Plus I didn’t have much time to spare.

Today was one of those days where words fail me. So much to do, so little time. So many people wants this and that. I’m trying m darndest best to keep my head above water. Luckily my powers of restrain didn’t fail me. I felt like swearing aloud a few times but managed to keep myself in check.

BSG sms’ed me tonight asking if I feel better already (been unwell the last 2 days). He’s such a sweet guy and I really appreciate his kindness. He’ll be based near where I work for the next 2 to 3 weeks. Maybe we’ll catch lunch one of these days. ;)

I gotta do some work before I call it a night. Updating goals can wait. I’ll do it one shot probably over the weekend. :)